Honest Effort: The Trials of Lincoln

[TTX]

Yeah, I wouldn't have put much money on Abe beating Rikidozan especially two out of three falls, but sometimes the dice play tricks on you.

Always a lot of fun.

[Kamala]

Tough match-up for honest Abe.

[LWPD]

"I am not accustomed to the language of eulogy. I have never studied the art of paying compliments to women. But I must say, that if all that has been said by orators and poets since the creation of the world in praise of women were applied to the women of America, it would not do them justice."

-Abraham Lincoln

Honest Effort: The Trials of Lincoln

Creative

Since embarking on his tour of LEGENDSonline Series 1, Abraham Lincoln has been through some very interesting times. Today on this special Mother's Day edition of the Trials of Lincoln, baton down the hatches and expect the unexpected, as the Honest One enters the realm of the truly bizarre. Watch as Abe teams with the lovely Mildred Burke in a mixed tag match against Paul Ellering and Ida Mae Martinez, under some very unique sets of rules!

LEGENDSonline Series 1 Tour: Match 8

Abraham Lincoln & Mildred Burke vs Paul Ellering & Ida Mae Martinez (2 out of 3 Falls)

Play by Play

First Fall: Nightmare Matrix Rules

Before the match begins, the ring crew carefully double checks every nook and cranny of the awe inspiring Matrix that encloses the ring. After inspection is complete, the bell rings and we are under way! The ladies kick things off as Mildred Burke goes to work on Ida with a grinding face lock. A hard whip into the ropes triggers The Matrix, as the ring starts violently 'spinning around' as both women fall down dizzy. Once the ring around the rosie stops, Mildred gets to her feet first and hits a SUNSET FLIP...1,2,KICKOUT BY IDA. With both ladies still a bit taken aback, Abe tags in, forcing Paul Ellering to make an exchange of his own. A half nelson and crotch lift staggers the Precious One. Without warning, the ominous Matrix is triggered once again, as a visibly frantic Lincoln hallucinates being attacked by members of the Confederate Army. Instead of committing Abe to the funny farm, Ellering seizes the advantage and connects with a running knee lift. After regaining his bearings, Abe counters a clubbing forearm and locks in a center ring full nelson...but Ida creeps up behind like a thief in the night, low blowing The Honest One in the bread basket. The ladies make the exchange once again. Mildred goes to work with a backbreaker that leaves Ida laying. Burke signals and locks in the ALLIGATOR CLUTCH...but Ellering clotheslines Mildred hard from behind. The men now exchange position as Abe goes to work with a stiff right jab that floors Ellering. It must be a red letter day, because the Matrix is triggered once again, as the ring lights go out, placing the wrestlers in complete and utter darkness for 30 seconds. When light returns, Abe has Ellering locked in a hammerlock...but Paul barely drapes his foot under the bottom rope. A fired up Lincoln has seen enough of these shenanigans...THROAT LIFT SLAM...1,2,3! Lincoln and Burke take the first fall!

Second Fall: Gutarr Stick Match

A brief intermission allows a suit from the back to hype up the use of the Gutarr Stick. Using the tone of a carnival barker from days of old, the man is joined center ring by his nameless lovely assistant, who holds various objects in a circus like breaking ceremony. Amid the pomp and circumstance, the stick is used to split a watermelon in half, stab through a thick plank, and when the stick splinters, the deadly jagged edge is thrown like a spear into a target board. A commercial plug is made for the manufacturer of the Gutarr Stick, marketed as a utility self defense weapon, as the elaborate exhibition finally draws to a close!

After the referee chains the wrists of the competitors with access to the Gutarr sticks with-in reach of all four wrestlers, we are good to go! At the bell Abe continues his assault on Ellering with a single leg takedown. A whip into the ropes sees Ellering take a hard shot to the head with a Gutarr Stick, busting him open. A blind tag to Ida signals that the ladies now make their way in. Ida locks in a standing headlock and then hits a flying head scissors for a near fall. DROPKICK...1,2, BURKE KICKSOUT! Ida signals for the Texas Cloverleaf but Mildred gets to the ropes. Mildred regains her momentum and then bashes Ida with a wicked Gutarr Stick shot to the abdomen, breaking it in half! As Mildred goes to pick up the other half of the broken stick, Ida beats her to the punch, smashing Burke in the head with the jagged edge of the stick. Mildred now sports a crimson mask! Ida follows up with a forearm smash to the bloody Burke, but Mildred shows her ring generalship under fire and makes a lunging tag to Lincoln. The men make the exchange as Abe takes Ellering down hard with a headlock throw. In desperation mode, Ellering rolls out of the ring, but the Honest One is in hot pursuit. A brawl near the steel ring post sees Abe break a Gutarr Stick over Ellering's right shoulder, as his stick shatters in two from the impact. Abe then tosses one of the ends of his broken stick to Mildred, who waffles Ida in the head and then digs the jagged edge into her right eye Magnum T.A./Tully Blanchard I Quit Cage Match style. Ida screams out in pain but refuses to quit. Mildred signals and then locks in the ALLIGATOR CLUTCH on a bloody Ida...who passes out in short order! Lincoln and Burke sweep the series, 2 falls to none!


Booking The Honest One

One of the challenges I took on with this project is having to find a way to use every card, in every set, at least once. In LEGENDSonline Series 1, two cards stood out as ones I wasn't looking forward to using: Ida Mae Martinez (the only woman in the set) and Paul Ellering (great as a supplement manager card to the Road Warriors, but not much of a stand alone wrestler card). In order to meet the challenge, I decided to kill two birds with one stone and go with a mixed tag. I also took the liberty of bringing in Mildred Burke (from the LOW Vintage 4 Pack) as Abe's partner in crime.

The last time I had a hand in booking anything resembling a mixed tag match was all the way back in December '08 on Swarm's GBITG. Board member Matt ran a match prediction contest in his Fed (Matt's New Beginning Fed - Chapter 2) in which the winner would be allowed to book one match on a future supercard of his. As the lucky winner, in an effort to give him something memorable to work with, I gave him a program involving two men, two women and one Jamie B Wilson specialty match. Over the course of several cards, he took what I gave him, improved upon it, and knocked the concept out of the park. For those interested, you can see how Matt booked that multi-part angle and blow off match here: Matt's New Beginning Fed - Chapter 2: Angle & Execution: Wolf & Amazonia vs Monolith & Strafe 'Double Elimination Chandelier Death Match'.

Borrowing a page from that experience, I decided to have fun with this by using some official FG Champions of the Galaxy style charts that may be a curiosity for 'LOW only' promoters. As for the mixed tag match itself, I used an exclusivity rule (man vs man, woman vs woman) with a tag in any form (offensive or defensive) forcing a change in which two wrestlers were legal. The format was a change of pace, as it gave a fatigued wrestler the chance to switch momentum markedly with a defensive tag out. All in all, Abe didn't have too much trouble during his sequences with Paul Ellering. The fire power for the LOD mentor just wasn't there. Abe's partner, Mildred Burke, is a beast of a card. Her offense overwhelmed Ida from nearly bell to bell. To her credit, Martinez showed some spunk and even carried a late rally in the second fall, but her PIN 7 (4) is a huge handicap when going against a top flight opponent with double finishers.

With a touch of bewilderment, the fictional Abe now walks away from an experience that he won't soon forget!

Nightmare Matrix: The Chart

This is a 2d6 chart with eleven possible outcomes. Use is triggered by any chart situation or (lv) roll, which is followed by a 2d6 roll that has to be with-in a certain range. The chart can be used in either singles or tag, no DQ or count out, match ends by pinfall or submission. Originally a part of the GWF 2111 set, the general concept is that the matrix is a box that surrounds the ring and can create hallucinations inside the minds of the wrestlers. I'm not into sci-fi stuff and had never used this chart until now. While I was hesitant going in, it was surprisingly fun to roll out. Outcomes such as having the ring spin, wacky imagery, hyperventilation, panic attacks and the lights going out were unique ways to spice up the action. If you are an 'LOW only' player who is looking for something a bit out of the ordinary for one of your programs, you may want to check this one out. The sci-fi back-story can be easily worked around and the outcomes can be kayfabed. This chart is sold in the online store as Centra Coffin Match/Nightmare Matrix Match.

Gutarr Stick Match: The Chart

This is a five tier 2d6 chart with twenty possible outcomes. Chart use is triggered in substitute of the regular charts, with designated advantages based on attributes. Can be used in either singles or tag matches, no DQ or count out. The Gutarr Stick is a fictional four foot 'wood like stick/rod like weapon' that is attached to the wrestler's wrist with a chain. Each of the standard charts has 4 possible 2d6 outcomes, with a special 'high impact' fifth chart that comes into play only if the Gutarr Stick 'breaks'. As far as the official CotG charts go, this is among the most comprehensive. It doesn't have sci-fi elements, which means it can easily be incorporated into LOW game play without much adjustment. If you are looking for a different style of weapons match for your Fed, you may want to give this one some consideration. This chart is sold in the online store as Gutarr Stick Match/Pictor Four Corners Match.


Paul Ellering: The Man

Paul Ellering was a weightlifter who transitioned into the world of pro wrestling in 1978 after going through Verne Gagne's training camp in Minneapolis. With a standout physique, he adopted a tie dye look and interview style similar to Superstar Billy Graham. A moderate success in several territories, Ellering was hampered by knee injuries to the point that he eventually stopped wrestling full time, transitioning into a manger role. Paul's big break came in George circa '83, where he was positioned as the mouthpiece of the newly formed Road Warriors. Not only did Ellering help to mentor the two youngsters on camera, but he also managed their business duties behind the scenes. The relationship lasted for over a decade, and both Hawk and Animal have lauded Ellering as a pivotal component of their career success.

From a fan perspective, I was never really into Paul Ellering as a talent. I found his interview style and presence to be forgettable. His work pre-knee injury showed some promise, but fate left it unfulfilled. That said, he did display an ability to speak extemporaneously, and all signs pointed to him being an intelligent man who had a strong grasp on the inner workings of the industry. I suspect the way things turned out was a blessing in disguise, maxing out his potential in the business. To his credit, he took the ball and ran with it for what it was.

Paul Ellering vs Bill Dundee 5/24/80


Paul Ellering vs Leadberry 1980


Paul Ellering vs Pat Rose 1983


Precious Paul Ellering/Persian Club Challenge


Paul Ellering vs Teddy Long 'Hair vs Hair Match' 5/19/90



Paul Ellering: The Card



Height: 6'0
Weight: 240 lbs.
Grey Lake, MN

This is an interesting card. Paul's offense is his greatest strength, but even that is on the weak side. His L1O features a phantom advantage, where a move - 3 is tied to a very weak attribute, which makes it likely to be countered by most opponents. His L30 is enhancement level, netting only 1 point. Defensively he carries three down - 3 designations and a lowly PIN 7 (4). Ellering is attribute negative (-6 points) which will make his matches against the moderately athletic an uphill climb. All that being said, the mastermind of the Legion of Doom has two bright spots: i. tag proficiency on all levels, and ii. an impressive Distractor Rating of 7, mirroring his forte as a presence at ringside. Used as an occasional partner of the Road Warriors, he may have some utility, but his best bet for success is guiding them from a distance.


Ida Mae Martinez: The Woman

The role of Ida Mae Martinez was played by Ida St. Laurent, who entered the business in 1950. A product of promoter Billy Wolfe, she was a prominent feature on the ladies circuit until her retirement in '60. A brief bio in her own words can be read here.

From a fan perspective, I honestly don't know very much about Ida Mae. She was featured in the women's wrestling documentary Lipstick & Dynamite. The focal point of her legacy seems to be the challenges of her upbringing, her ability to find success as a performer, and her societal contributions outside of the industry. Ida passed away on January 2010 at age 78.

Tribute to Ida Mae Martinez



Ida Mae Martinez: The Card



Height: 5'2
Weight: 125 lbs.
Norwich, CT

On paper, Ida appears to be a good utility player. Offensively the card is respectable, netting 17 points. She carries a L1O move - 3 and a handicap free L2O. Even at a low potency, her L30 static potency double finishers make her a threat to the fatigued. Ida has mixed attributes with power being her weak point, and tag proficiency on all levels. Defensively her only glaring weakness is the PIN 7 (4) on L3D. All in all, this is a card that probably places with-in the second tier of a Top 10, and she could be a sleeper in both singles and tag action.


Mildred Burke: The Woman

The role of Mildred Burke was played by Mildred Bliss. She debuted in the business in 1935, working carnivals under the promotion of her husband Billy Wolfe. For nearly twenty years, Burke was often a champion on the ladies circuit, and was routinely used in inter-gender matches (which she usually won). At her peak she attained a level of mainstream acclaim, and I'd attribute the credit more toward her hard work than that of her husband. Upon divorcing from Wolfe in '52, Burke's career nosedived as she was undercut on the promotional end. She made a go of running her own operation before retiring in 1956. To this day, she is widely regarded as among the biggest female stars in the history of the industry.

From a fan perspective, Mildred Burke is one of those iconic names that I heard about in passing, but never really knew too much about. From what little footage exists, she was attractive and athletic. Back then, just as it is now, the industry was male dominated and contained a glass ceiling. To her credit, Burke was a standout talent who thrived against the odds and left a pivotal mark. Were it possible, I would have loved to have seen the Burke vs June Byers 'shoot bout' from 8/20/54. A legit legend, Mildred passed away in February '89.

Mildred Burke Tribute


Mildred Burke vs Millie Stafford


*Possibly of further interest:

Mildred served as a consultant in the female wrestling movie All The Marbles:

All The Marbles Movie Trailer


All The Marbles (available for purchase)


The careers of both Ida and Mildred were covered in the film Lipstick and Dynamite:

Lipstick and Dynamite Trailer


Lipstick And Dynamite (available for purchase)


Mildred Burke: The Card



Height: 5'2
Weight: 138 lbs.
Coffeyville, Kansas

Without question, Mildred Burke is among the top level female stars in the history of the game, arguably the Lou Thesz of the ladies division. Her offensive arsenal is outstanding, netting 21 total points. She combines that with a lock down defense that consists of five defensive counters, a PIN 4 (1) and attributes that net another 14 points. Mildred's only weakness is a lack of tag proficiency, reflecting her focus on being a singles competitor. A world class card!


Going Forward

After a stint outside conventional boundaries, the Great Emancipator will take a trip somewhat back toward normalcy. Yet how 'normal' his next experience will be can only be gaged in the eye of the beholder. See you next time, on the Trials of Lincoln!

[Matt]

Bloody women, 2 out of 3 falls, Abe Lincoln, a Gutarr Stick and a plug for my fed? Awesome!!

[Kamala]

Mildred and Abe tough team.

[TTX]

Fun stuff...cool to see GWF matches in Legends and another win for Lincoln along with a great showing from Mildred Burke.

[LWPD]

May 13, 2012 18:41:04 GMT -5 Matt said:

Bloody women, 2 out of 3 falls, Abe Lincoln, a Gutarr Stick and a plug for my fed? Awesome!!

Thanks Matt. Valued praise from a great old school promoter!

[LWPD]

May 13, 2012 18:59:24 GMT -5 TTX said:

Fun stuff...cool to see GWF matches in Legends and another win for Lincoln along with a great showing from Mildred Burke.

Incorporating all types of different rules and specialty matches into the mix is a guilty pleasure of mine. Some of the official FG charts that were originally GWF intended can seem a bit wacky when used in an LOW context...but in some ways that's part of the fun!

[LWPD]

May 13, 2012 18:45:40 GMT -5 Kamala said:

Mildred and Abe tough team.

Every great hero needs a stand out leading lady. In another place, another time, another dimension, Mildred and Abe could have been the Filsinger Games version of Bogie and Bacall.

"Here's looking at you, kid!"

-Abraham Lincoln to Mildred Burke

[LWPD]

"If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?"

-Abraham Lincoln

Honest Effort: The Trials of Lincoln

Creative

After a most bizarre experience teaming with Mildred Burke against the odd couple unit of Ida Mae Martinez and Paul Ellering, Honest Abe comes back to a more traditional setting. Yet his return to something a bit more simple will not come without its own unique form of challenge, as he now goes head up with a man feared the industry over, the legendary Killer Kowalski!

LEGENDSonline Series 1 Tour: Match 9

Abraham Lincoln vs Killer Kowalski (Titan Death Match: Wilder Version)

Play by Play

Like a shark who smells blood, Kowalski is in Lincoln's face even before the bell, launching into a verbal barrage of intense trash talk. The ref signals and we are under way. After an alpha male push exchange, Abe sends KK into the turnbuckle, but the big man from Windsor, Ontario greets a hard charging Lincoln with a reverse elbow to the head. Using some sweet science, Abe regains his momentum, wearing down Kowalski with a full nelson. KK shrugs off a double leg takedown, and follows up with a headlock and punch combo, and then a brutal powerslam. He then tosses Lincoln hard to the concrete floor outside the ring, connecting with an apron dive knee drop to the side of Lincoln's left ear. Back inside Kowalski sets Abe up for a choke using the ropes, but the Honest One deftly counters. Kowalski then returns the favor, powering out of a half nelson and crotch lift. Ever the showman, The Killer then takes a moment to jawbone back and forth menacingly with a hostile crowd, before an overhead body slam takes its toll on Abe. Double K locks in a stomach claw, but Lincoln forces the break by making the ropes. Kowalski once against sends Lincoln outside to the floor, as the two men battle wildly into the crowd, all the way to the backstage area. Kowalski goes to throw Lincoln into a vending machine, but Abe reverses, sending Kowalski face first through the glass. Kowalski is now busted one. Officials from the back encourage both men to make their way back to the ring, which they do while exchange blows. Back inside, Abe locks in a hammerlock, and then follows up with a spinning leg lariat, the force of which carries KK over the top rope, with Lincoln in hot pursuit. The Great Emancipator then sends Kowalski flying hard into the titanium ring steps. Back inside, THROAT LIFT SLAM, 1,2,KOWALSKI KICKSOUT WITH AUTHORITY! A crimson Kowalski again rolls out of the ring. As Lincoln stands on the apron and goes to pull him back in, KK blasts Abe in the face with an unknown international object! Lincoln falls down hard like a brick, as blood gushes from his nose like a faucet. Kowalski slides back inside and drags Abe to the center of the ring, and then locks in the giant swing for an amazing twenty rotations. With an extremely dizzy, badly weakened Lincoln left laying on the mat, Kowalski signals for the CLAW HOLD...1,2,3! Lincoln is cleanly pinned!


Booking The Honest One

This was an all out brawl. As intended, the chart fired up the no rules, anything goes, street fight vibe. The outcomes were higher impact than normally found on the out of the ring chart, and took away any element of sport style wrestling match that comes with using the deathjump chart. Killer Kowalski thrived in this environment. He countered almost everything Abe tried to throw at him on L10 & L2O, and survived a few scares by rolling on (lv) and capitalizing with the chart results. On the flip side, character wise Abe was out of his element. The dice put him in some potentially good positions, but Kowalski's defense was lockdown and contained Abe from ever getting much of a rhythm going. Hopefully he'll take it on the chin, and use it as a learning experience.


Titan Death Match (Wilder Version): The Chart

This is a 2d6 chart with eleven possible outcomes. Use is triggered in substitute of out of the ring, deathjump and (lv) scenarios. The chart can accommodate outside interference, and may be used in either singles or tag matches. There are no disqualifications or count outs, and the match must end inside the ring, by either pin or submission.

The original Titan Death Match was a part of the very first Champions of the Galaxy set (GWF 2087). Titan is a planet, and the 'death match' was a set of instructions that guaranteed a decisive finish (by either pin or submission). Any scenario that could lead to a disqualification, count out or outside interference was negated, and any resulting injuries were doubled in duration. This 'wilder version' takes the original idea and goes a few steps further. A full chart with outcomes ranging from down - 3, add 1 and pin/submission attempts help to flesh out the intended style of match. The rules make use of two of the regular charts (out of the ring and deathjump) null and void. The match itself flowed well, with fairly wide diversity in consequences. There is some sci-fi terminology listed in the outcomes (ie. Space Roamers, Vid Monitors) but that can be easily modified. In fact, the LOW Ringside Companion has a real world version of this chart titled Texas Death Match (hardcore version) that parrots the outcomes without any of the sci-fi terms. Players without access to the LOW RC, as well as players on a budget looking to cherry pick the charts they buy, may want to consider giving this one a shot. This is sold in the online store as Titan Death Match/Circinus Cell Match.

Killer Kowalski: The Man

The role of Killer Kowalski was played by the Canadian born Edward 'Walter' Spulnik (10/13/26). A college student who majored in electrical engineering, Walter entered the world of pro wrestling in 1947, intending to use it as an avenue toward paying off his tuition. With standout size and athleticism, he was an instant success who rose up the card quickly, working NWA World Title matches as early as '48. During a match, a knee drop accidentally ripped off a piece of his opponent's (Yukon Eric) already badly damaged cauliflower ear. The incident became forever married to his gimmick as a dangerous roughhouse. Kowalski held countless titles across a myriad of promotions, and is considered to be Bruno Sammartino's top drawing opponent during his two WWWF world title reigns. In real life, Walter was a vegetarian, who avoided drinking, smoking and drug use. Many of his contemporaries have spoken in praise of his disciplined mindset and spartan like work ethic. A perennial headliner throughout the world, Kowalski's full time run as an active talent came to an end in '77. In making the transition, he opened a training school for aspiring talent, the Killer Kowalski Institute for Professional Wrestling. Famous graduates included Big John Studd, Triple H, Perry Saturn, Lord Tensai and Chyna. Although he stepped outside of the mainstream circuit, the Killer continued to work the independent scene until '93. A true legend, Kowalski passed away in August '08 at the age of 81.

From a fan perspective, footage capturing Kowalski's younger years is sparse, but from what I have seen, I'm nothing less than very impressed. He was a very talented all around worker, with impressive size and excellent presence. He was very athletic and willing to take bumps. Most importantly, he had an ability to project himself effectively and generate gut level visceral reactions from the crowd that translated into making money. For most of his career, he worked at or near the top of the card, a testament to his drawing power. What survives from his mid 70s WWWF run (ie. his matches below with Bruno and Pedro) should be viewed in the context of his being seen well past his physical prime. A credible argument can be made that Killer Kowalski belongs very highly ranked when seriously discussing the greatest big men of all time.

Killer Kowalski vs Yukon Eric 1/14/53


Killer Kowalski vs Gene Stanlee 1953


Killer Kowalski vs Verne Gagne 1953


Killer Kowalski vs Pat O'Connor 7/22/54


Killer Kowalski vs Buddy Rogers '2 out of 3 Falls' 1963




Killer Kowalski vs Giant Baba 1964


Killer Kowalski vs Pedro Morales 1974


Killer Kowalski vs Bruno Sammartino 4/29/74


Walter "Killer" Kowalski 'Prime Time Interview'


Killer Kowalski on Letterman 1982



Triple H pays tribute to Killer Kowalski



Killer Kowalski: The Card


Height: 6'7
Weight: 290 lbs.
Windsor, Ontario, Canada

This is a solid all around card. Killer Kowalski's offense nets 17 total points, featuring an advantaged attribute move - 3 on L1O, three move - 3 designations on L2O and a mid tier static potency finisher on L3O. His only handicaps are a move - 2 on L3O and a notch below elite status PIN 6 (3). Kowalski proudly sports a steel curtain L1D & L2D, combining for six total counters. He lacks tag proficiency, but his overall attributes net a respectable 8 points. On paper this is an extremely tough contender to any singles title, and with the cooperative magic of the dice, a potential headlining champion.


Going Forward

There is no rest for the weary, as Abraham Lincoln prepares to take his show on the road, in what is sure to be a death defying extravaganza. Join us next time on a very special Memorial Day edition of the Trials of Lincoln!