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Post by Justin Case on Jun 4, 2020 11:16:12 GMT -5
I should really work on that Monolith Jr. jobber card for you! That would fit in good with the WORST! 🤪😆🤣
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Post by Shane Sullivan on Jun 4, 2020 17:07:40 GMT -5
It would be an honor and a privilege to use monolith jr. Especially if he's really terrible. Chris and I would put him to good use..er bad use.
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Post by Shane Sullivan on Jun 4, 2020 17:12:25 GMT -5
Cephus has the better team. For the record I will not be attending any of the shows. At least not inside. I plan to be outside picketing this abomination in hopes of getting it canceled to protect the kids. You may just be the only sane person in the bleak zone. We welcome you none the less good citizen. |
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Post by cman on Jun 4, 2020 18:27:46 GMT -5
Cephus has the better team. For the record I will not be attending any of the shows. At least not inside. I plan to be outside picketing this abomination in hopes of getting it canceled to protect the kids. I am sure you wont be the only one out there picketing, I would not be surprised if the entire outside was picketing, save for those two poor souls that had to endure that craptastic show. |
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Post by on_the_edge on Jun 4, 2020 23:31:48 GMT -5
Cephus has the better team. For the record I will not be attending any of the shows. At least not inside. I plan to be outside picketing this abomination in hopes of getting it canceled to protect the kids. You may just be the only sane person in the bleak zone. We welcome you none the less good citizen. Me? Sane? Mwahahahahahaha!!!!!!!! |
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Post by on_the_edge on Jun 4, 2020 23:36:46 GMT -5
Cephus has the better team. For the record I will not be attending any of the shows. At least not inside. I plan to be outside picketing this abomination in hopes of getting it canceled to protect the kids. I am sure you wont be the only one out there picketing, I would not be surprised if the entire outside was picketing, save for those two poor souls that had to endure that craptastic show. Seriously what kind of fed are they running. There was a guy sleeping on a bear. Not a bear skin rug in front of a fireplace like god intended but an actual bear. Then later as the bear slept fans were throwing popcorn at him. I swear it seemed like every fan in the place was doing it. Oh there were only two fans? Then I guess I was right. We're here...there's a bear...adults performing in their underwear |
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Post by Shane Sullivan on Jun 6, 2020 23:43:24 GMT -5
Chapter six: Dialectus’s Week: SO you want to be a Champion? (Part 1)
Cephus is in the ring, he has a championship belt held high over his head, the ref, a hot chick in a striped metal bikini razes his other hand in triumph. Sadie is on the outside jumping up in down in joy…she too is wearing a metal bikini. Cephus smiles as he looks down at his boot, which is on the chest of his nemesis Gordon G. Smack. The announcer in a metal bikini announces, “..and your new Holo-vision Champion of the…Cephus wake up!”
Cephus opens his eye and sees Sadie already perfectly dressed looking down at him.
“Come on, get dressed, Dialectus expects us to have the matches ready to go and all the flyers posted around the Bleak Zone. Abroz’s team only had two fans. We can do better than that. So get up lazy bones.” Sadie throws a pillow at Cephus’s head.
He swats it away and gets up.
“The Cephus had a wonderful dream, where the Cephus beat Smack for his Holo-Vision belt.”
“Holo-Net.” Sadie corrects him.
“What the hell is a Holo-Net anyway?”
“It is were people a hundred years ago went to write on message boards, air grievances, whine about stuff and exchange recipes. They would even post fake matches of wrestlers and even pretend to run fake feds.”
“That is really sad….Almost makes the Cephus feel sorry for Gordon….almost….but I really want that belt, the Holo-whatever. It will look amazing around the Cephus’s waist.”
Cephus grabs his ring jacket as they both head out the door. A few minutes later they arrive at the Regulus Arena a flapping poster of W.O.R.S.T. wrestling snaps above the arena door. A man is holding a sign that reads. “Save the Children, Avoid the Worse.” Cephus looks at the man who mean mugs him as he goes through the door. Sadie looks at the sign and just sighs at the misspelling.
Once inside they both see Dialectus yelling at his team of wrestlers as they do their morning workouts.
“Who Duct Taped Ursa Major to the Dark Star Creatures butt!!??”
All the wrestlers snicker at this, but all of the keep their heads down. Dialectus sees Cephus and runs over.
“Do you have tonight’s matches? We have to set our side of the tournament to crown the W.O.R.S.T. champion.”
“Don’t worry Dialtone, the Cephus has it all up here.” Cephus points at his head.
“What?! No! You have nothing up there! This is a travesty! You said you would have them….”
Sadie slaps a list into Dialectus’s chest. “It’s right here, Cephus even handed out all the flyers to the people in the Bleak Zone”. Cephus’s eyes go wide and he turns to walk away.
“Cephus O’Reilly! Did you hand out the flyers?” Sadie stomps her foot.
“Define hand out.”
Sadie hauls off and whacks Cephus with her purse. He flies into Bishop Hell who is doing arm curls. Hell lands on his butt and starts to conjure a fireball. “How dare you touch my person!”
Cephus rolls up to his feet in a flash and takes off running. He grabs a stack of flyers that were on a trash can and runs out the arena door.
“I am so going to get eaten.” Dialectus puts his head in his hands.
“Don’t worry, Cephus will get it done. Let’s go let everyone know who they match up with.” Sadie grab Dialectus’s hand and leads him to the wrestlers.
To be continued tomorrow, namely because I haven’t put in all my CAC stats in.
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Post by Shane Sullivan on Jun 9, 2020 16:45:17 GMT -5
Chapter six: Dialectus’s Week: SO you want to be a Champion? (Part 2)
Dialectus looks at the clock on the wall, seven minutes past seven, only two fans are in attendance. an old man named Vidtek with an ancient vid-camera had agreed to film the event for Vid disc sales. He told a tale of leaving his universe to travel to Dimension X, something happened and he had been stranded in the Bleak zone for thirty years. He was so happy to see wrestling he volunteered to film for free. Dialectus looked at this as things were looking up. That was two hours ago.
A young man wearing an old battle helmet approached him.
“So, we fighting or what?”
“A few more minutes Zouave.”
“Look old man, I’ve been in some sorry ass arenas, but this takes the damn cake you have two whole fans. If that blonde guy hadn’t paid me in advance, well all of us in advance, we would have left already. So, we fighting or what?"
Dialectus looks down in defeat and nods.
“Cool.” The young man walks over to an old man in a battered clack and red cowl. “Yo, Hell, lets get the Koala, we have a match.”
Bishop hell puts down his cigar, nods and heads back to the locker room.
Cephus runs in and is herding ten women in habits into the arena.
“The Cephus has prevailed. Cephus has found ten paying customers.”
The ladies go and take seats around the arena.
Dialectus is overjoyed. “Where did you find them?”
“The Cephus never kisses and tells.”
Sadie comes up behind Cephus like a cobra. “Oh you will tell me mister.”
Cephus blanches then looks back at his lady love. “Um dearest, so you see the Church of The One was around the corner and the Cephus agreed to buy all their baked goods, if they came and watched young men get baptized. So they came. Hehe..”
“You lied to Nuns?”
“No, the Cephus is sure some will bleed tonight, it will a baptism in blood!”
“You are an idiot.” Dialectus walks away.
“Cephus? …..seriously?”
“What? Everyone else said no, there was a bowling tournament tonight. You know how hard it is to compete against bowling?”
Sadie sighs and walks back the snack bar.
First Match: Bishop Hell vs. Zouave the Conqueror. Referee Cuddly Claw.
Bishop Hell’s music hits the light go off and fire lights the way from locker room to the ring.
“Tonight, I will eviscerate, and feed on the flesh of my cooked foe! I am Bishop Hell and hell comes with me!!” He steps in to the ring wearing a beat-up old cowl. His hand is on fire as he laughs maniacally at the Nuns. It is quite the sight. The Nuns cross themselves and begin praying.
Zouave comes in right after and jumps in the ring.
Bell sounds: Both men fight for three minutes, Bishop Hell looks tired and Zouave looks lost. Cuddly Claw was asleep two minutes into the match. The Nuns were bored. The two fans were cheering like crazy for Zouave, who tried to put the Bishop in a head lock but just could hold it. Finally, Bishop Hell, seeing the ref was sleeping hit Zouave with a Hellfire. He kicked awake the Koala and pinned a smoldering Zouave.
The two male fans booed the Bishop as the Nuns got up and walked over to Cephus. A few minutes later nine Nuns walked out with their money and baked goods. One still sat in her seat. A little old lady Nun, was smiling just a bit as the Bishop caught his cowl on fire on accident and stomped around trying to put himself out while leaving the ring.
The rest of the first round tournament matches.
Eagle Defeated Torpor by countout.
Eradicator defeated Gila by Countout.
Creeper defeated Taurine with the Eliminator.
Pollux defeated Mass using the ole foot on the ropes pin. Mass after the match picked up Pollux and tossed him into the rows of empty chairs.
Massive beat Blackhole Bart with a cross body pin off the top rope.
Astro Turk beat Huge by DQ, when Massive interfered.
Duck Boy handled Antak with a Duck and Cover.
Son of Ram defeated Romulus with Horns of Death. Taurine attacked Son of Ram after the match and Antak came in for the save, all four brawled back to the locker room, garnering another slight smile from Sister Agnes Marie.
The Final match was Dark Star Creature Versus Ursa Major. Since both were still duct taped together, once the match started Cuddly Claw fearing for his life as the Dark Star Creature flailed around the ring trying to get Ursa off his butt called a double DQ. The entire locker room came out to watch the spectacle. Finally, Dialectus and Cuddly Claw were able to free Ursa Major once the Dark Star Creature exhausted himself.
The two male fans went home after getting some autographs and pictures then the doors closed on a really bad week for W.O.R.S.T.
"Well at least we had one more than Abroz." Dialectus said with a sigh.
Vidtek walked up with a vid disk. "Here you go boss. Next week?"
"Yeah sure. Thanks for the help."
"No problem. Was good to see some real wrestling, can't stand bowling. All everyone does here bowl. Have a good night."
"Yeah..Night."
Late that night in the empty arena. Cephus sneaks in and puts his name in the second-round bracket to face Son of Ram. As he walks away an old nun comes out of the shadows and smiles.
“So it begins.”
The second round will begin next week with Abroz’s bracket.
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Post by on_the_edge on Jun 13, 2020 3:47:09 GMT -5
Did I see me protesting? Wait if I was there how could I be here to see it. I think I'm tripping. I knew I shouldn't have bought those brownies. Never trust nuns. Speaking of it is a shame one remained. None nuns would have been appropriate. Nun the less this is the best worst I have ever seen. Even if I'm worried about nightmares of Ursa taped to Dark Star Creature. Especially if they are both wearing metal bikinis. Yikes!
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Post by Shane Sullivan on Jun 21, 2020 9:58:29 GMT -5
Humm and old nun in a metal bikini.....wonder if Werner ever did that for W3?
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