Thanks as always to CRUEFAN for the Aftershow and Troy for his comments. Onward!
Heartland Championship Wrestling
King of the Indies: Chikara!
September 16, 2017 (Card #802)
Druley Gymnasium, Richmond, Indiana
The show opens with the tune, "Awake and Alive" by Skillet playing overhead. DAYTONDAVE & WARLORD enter the arena to the cheers of fans. Warlord: Fight, fight, Inner Light! Kill, Quakers, Kill! Beat 'em, Beat 'em, Knock 'Em Senseless! Do It 'til We Reach Consensus!
(
Cheers)
Daytondave: Hey, fans! Welcome to Earlham College and CHIKARA Saturday Night. It wouldn't be CHIKARA without a cheap pop from our good friend Warlord.
Warlord: Fight exuberantly! Fight exuberantly! Compel them to relinquish the ball!
(
Cheers)
Daytondave: Quite the pep rally from the world's largest honorary Quaker! And tonight, the little town of Richmond is going to play host to a huge night of wrestling action. We have a title match lined up for tonight, as well as a lot of major announcements about the big events to take place here in CHIKARA over the next few weeks. We're going to kick off the show with an old-fashioned CHIKARA Trios match, and there is plenty more to follow. We are going to light up the night here in Eastern Indiana, fans- so relax, grab yourself a cold one, and enjoy the show!
CHIKARA TRIOS: #1 CONTENDERS' MATCH
WILL OSPREAY*, JONATHAN GRESHAM**, & SHYNRON defeated 3.Ole (EL GENERICO*, SCOTT PARKER, & SHANE MATTHEWS*)Lots of great action between two exciting trios! Generico lit up the crowd early in the match, working over Gresham and dropping him- TWICE- with the Brainbustaaahhh!!! Gresham was stunned, but rolled out of the ring to be replaced by Shynron. Shynron had his hands full with Matthews, and Parker joined Big Magic for some effective double-teams. Ospreay hit the ring and blasted Matthews with an Essex Destroyer! Matthews rolled out of danger, leading to a high-speed duel between Ospreay and Generico! In a lightning sequence, Ospreay caught Generico with a handspring rebound enzuigiri and covered him for the flash pin!
Daytondave: Great job! Shynron and company have won the match and earned a shot at the CHIKARA Trios Championship!
Warlord: That's the good news. The bad news is, those little flippy dippies are going to have to deal with
TIM DONST & WAR MACHINE.Daytondave: Good point. It will take an amazing performance for these guys to beat the champs.
JERRY LYNN pinned MATT CROSS*A brief but action-packed bout. Lots of reversals and athletic exchanges turned for Lynn when he drilled Cross with a diving crossbody block. The move set the stage for Lynn to drop Cross for the pin with the Cradle Piledriver.
Daytondave: That's a big win for Jerry to keep his spot in the CHIKARA Top 8.
2017 INDEPENDENT TAG TEAM LEAGUE
THE OSIRIAN PORTAL (3-4) vs. PIECES OF HATE (4-3) The Portal looked at the top of their game tonight. Both Ophidian and Amasis ruled the ring, dispatching Jigsaw with the Osirian Sacrament to set up Ophidian for the Death Grip to finish off The Shard.
WINNERS: THE OSIRIAN PORTALDaytondave: That was a costly loss for the Pieces of Hate. They were within striking distance of
THE BRAVADO BROTHERS for the top spot in the CHIKARA Division. The Bravados just got one step closer to locking up the division.
As Daytondave completes his analysis, a delivery man arrives at ringside with an envelope.Warlord: Daytondave- you might want to check this out.
Daytondave: What is it?
Warlord: It's an envelope.
Daytondave: A poignant observation. Here, give me that. (
Daytondave opens the envelope.)
Daytondave: Whoa... Tim Donst is being threatened... I wonder where this came from?
Warlord: That delivery guy. Hey- why is the delivery guy threatening Tim Donst?
Daytondave facepalms.Daytondave: Fans- we will need to keep a close eye on this situation. We're going to head back to the ring now to look at a surprising match.
CHEERLEADER MELISSA has challenged
MALIA HOSAKA to a straight-up match, with the only stipulation being that
JIMMY HART will not be permitted at ringside.
SPECIAL CHALLENGE MATCH
CHEERLEADER MELISSA pinned MALIA HOSAKA***Malia came out determined to battle Melissa with all she had. But it was Melissa who dominated the bout, dropping Malia three times with the Kudoh Driver for a decisive victory.
After the match, Melissa helped Malia to her feet, then called for the microphone. Melissa: I'm not much of a talker, Malia- but I have had something on my mind since I fought Trish. How sad was it for Trish to get disqualified from that match? Trish is a wonderful wrestler, and so are you! Why don't you too leave that trash
JIMMY HART behind and make your own name? You're better than that.
Malia listens to Melissa and scowls. After a moment, Malia slaps Melissa across the face and leaves the ring.Warlord: Drama! Why is it always drama with these chicks?
Daytondave: Come on, Warlord- don't be sexist. Broads hate that. Melissa is trying to destroy the Hart stable from the inside out, but Malia is not hearing it. So, that's that. Let's turn it over to
LARRY SWEENEY for this week's edition of
"Sweet Talk". The scene shifts to the set of "Sweet Talk". LARRY SWEENEY struts around the stage with his characteristic smirk. JESSIE MCKAY & KIMBER LEE stand alongside Sweeney, scoffing at the fans around the set. Sweeney: Well, la-dee-freakin'-dah! Am I actually getting booed by Quakers? There's a first for everything! Not that YOUR opinion matters. You're here, I got your money, and I'm here to talk about the indies. So, let's do this. How about that
Line In The Sand pay-per-view? That action was off the charts! Kudos to
KENNY OMEGA & CHRIS SABIN for a big win in the
King Of The Indies Tag Team Championship match. And of course, our guy
DELIRIOUS picked up a big win over
RICOCHET to retain the
CHIKARA Grand Championship. Well done, men!
(
Cheers)
Sweeney: And that brings us to the KOTI Rankings for September. To the surprise of no one,
ADAM COLE is still the top dog in the indies. It has been a dominant year for Cole, as he has been putting aside challengers left and right. That brings us to the million dollar question- who's next for Cole? The answer is- our own CHIKARA Generic Secondary Champion,
ETHAN PAGE! Page has been on fire, and he has earned himself a shot at the gold! The negotiations are already under way to get this match on the books. I predict that Page will give the champ a good fight, but I expect Cole to prevail in the end.
(
Cheers)
Sweeney: Looking at the Tag Team rankings, it's all about
KENNY OMEGA & CHRIS SABIN. These guys continue to have a spectacular run as the best tag team in all of independent wrestling. Coming in at a distant second is
DA HIT SQUAD. Maffia and Mack have been tearing it up, and since they won the Ultimate Kombat Wrestling Tag Team Championship, they have earned the KOTI title shot.
(
Cheers)
Sweeney: CHEERLEADER MELISSA… what will we ever do with you? Melissa now holds BOTH the Heartland Ladies' and the Vegas Championship Wrestling Ladies' Titles, and that makes her number one with a bullet. Personal feelings aside, you gotta respect what this lady has accomplished. More on her later. Speaking of respect, I also gotta give it up for
THE CANADIAN NINJAS, still the top tag team on the ladies' scene.
(
Cheers)
Sweeney: So that's it for the rankings. For the rest of the night, we need to discuss what's on the horizon right here in the Heartland! It's September. That means it's almost October. And October in the Heartland means that
Tournament of Champions 2017 is just around the corner! Unless you have been under a rock for the last 11 years, you all know what the Tournament of Champions is. Every wrestler and every tag team who has held Heartland gold over the past 12 months will have the opportunity to wrestle for the coveted Filsinger Cup!
(
Cheers)
Sweeney: Tournament of Champions 2017 will go down on October 14 in Cleveland. With any luck, we'll be talking about the Indians in the World Series right about then. Over the next four weeks, we will have qualifying matches heading toward Cleveland- and we will start right here tonight! It will be
EDDIE KINGSTON taking on
RICOCHET in a semifinal match for the Men's Filsinger Cup tournament.
(
Cheers)
Sweeney: And of course, our own
KIMBER LEE will be part of the Ladies' tournament. This Wednesday night, Kimber will take on
MERCEDES MARTINEZ in the semifinals.
Kimber: I intend to beat her- I want another shot at Melissa!
Sweeney: You got this, baby cakes. Everyone be sure to be ready for October 14 in Cleveland to watch Kimber Lee bring back the Filsinger Cup!
(
Boos)
Sweeney: That's enough out of you creepy Quakers. In fact, I think I have dispensed as much wrestling knowledge as you people can handle for one night. So, I will throw it back to Daytondave and Warlord at ringside. So long, Richmond- the pleasure was yours!
Daytondave: Thank you, Larry, for an outstanding recap. Now let's check out some tag team action.
WAR MACHINE (RAYMOND ROWE*** & HANSON* w/TROY XAVIER) defeated LOS ICE CREAMS (EL HIJO*** & JUNIOR*****)Troy brought his team to the ring with designs of domination, but the Ice Creams put up quite a fight. Junior took a serious beating from both mambers of the Machine before escaping to tag in El Hijo. Rowe was shocked to find himself on the receiving end of a Cold Stone Stunner! El Hijo continued his assault on Rowe until Hanson hit the ring and obliterated El Hijo with a cartwheel lariat. Junior was unable to assist his partner as the Rowe and Hanson hoisted El Hijo up for the War Machine finisher to end it.
After the match, War Machine booted both members of Los Ice Creams out of the ring. Troy Xavier gave each of the Ice Creams a boot in the butt before climbing into the ring to celebrate with his men. But the celebration was interrupted when the arena went dark! A single spot shown at the top of the ring ramp, revealing two silhouettes behind the curtain. A powerful man accompanied by a large woman are revealed. The man and woman both clench their fists and point at the ring. The spotlight goes out, and when the lights return, the ring ramp is empty and the crowd is silent.Daytondave: How about that! The plot thickens around the warning issued to Tim Donst and the Xavier Alliance!
Warlord: That may be the biggest delivery girl I have ever seen!
Daytondave: Delivery girl? I don't think so- but whoever that was, they were a dangerous looking pair. The Xavier Alliance had better be watching their backs! All right, fans- next up, we present the first Qualifying Match for the Filsinger Cup!
FILSINGER CUP QUALIFYING MATCH: MEN'S SINGLES
EDDIE KINGSTON pinned RICOCHET***The return of Eddie Kingston to CHIKARA was a triumphant one. Ricochet found no success with his aerial moves, as Kingston caught a flying Ricochet with a brutal Yakuza Kick. Kingston roughed up Ricochet with clotheslines and chops. The arena floor offered no escape for Ricochet, as Kingston followed Ricochet outside the ring and belted him with a backfist. Ricochet staggered back in to the ring, and Kingston put him away with the Sliding D.
Daytondave: What an impressive performance by Kingston!
Warlord: Eddie ain't got time for no flippy dippy.
Daytondave: And Eddie is going to
Tournament of Champions 2017 for a shot at the Filsinger Cup! We'll learn the identity of Kingston's opponent two weeks from tonight when
DELIRIOUS takes on
ETHAN PAGE for the opportunity to face Kingston in Cleveland for the Cup. All right, fans- it's time for the Main Event!
MAIN EVENT: HEARTLAND LADIES' TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP
THE CANADIAN NINJAS (NICOLE MATTHEWS**** & PORTIA PEREZ** w/TROY XAVIER) defeated THE KILLER DEATH MACHINES (JESSICKA HAVOK** & NEVAEH) by disqualificationThe title match was an insane battle between two intense teams. Nevaeh fought both Ninjas to open the bout, battling her way out of enemy territory to bring Jessicka into the match. Jessicka wailed on Nicole, beating her down and dropping Nicole with the Havokiller for a near fall. Portia came in to make the save, and Portia caught Jessicka with a low dropkick to interrupt the cover. Nevaeh came in to defend her partner, but Portia ducked away and Nevaeh collided with Jessicka! All four ladies hit the ring, and the fur began to fly. Troy Xavier slid a title belt into the ring, but Jessicka grabed the belt and blasted Portia! The referee was forced to call for the bell.
THE CANADIAN NINJAS RETAIN THE HEARTLAND LADIES' TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPAfter the decision, Jessicka and Nicole had a staredown, which was disrupted when WAR MACHINE hit the ring! Nevaeh scrambled away to safety, but Rowe caught Jessicka by the hair and pitched her over the top rope! Jessicka landed hard, but Nevaeh came to her aid and helped her away from ringside. War Machine lifted the Ninjas onto their shoulders and paraded around the ring as Troy celebrated the victory.Daytondave: Are you kidding me? Things happen in the heat of battle- I get that- but for a man the size of Raymond Rowe to put his hands on a lady wrestler is WAY over the top.
Warlord: That's messed up, dude.
Daytondave: That's beyond messed up- that's mangled. All right, fans- we're done here. I suppose I should congratulate the Ninjas for retaining the Heartland Ladies' Tag Team Titles- but I am not a happy promoter after what just went down at the end of the match. Fans- thanks for checking us out tonight. CHIKARA will be back on Wednesday night with more excitement, including another Filsinger Cup Qualifying Match pitting
MERCEDES MARTINEZ against
KIMBER LEE. That's our show, and I AM OUTTA HERE!
