Pariah ,
Vegas ,
cruefan68 - With The Front outnumbering OI4K, their old friend Sami Callihan decided to help out. Trios match in the future? No doubt. Danny Havoc currently has the longest win streak in the history of my CZW at seven. That number should tell you how hard it is to establish a solid run in this fed. As far as the new versions of Sami and Shane Strickland go, I'm not sure how or when I will put them in the lineup. Strickland has always done good for me in the mid-card. He's one of my favorite CZW wrestlers so a stronger card will suit me fine for a main event push. Well, it's that time again. Tournament of Death with my usual extra-length, blood-soaked write up. Enjoy!
June 11, 2016
Marklands Little Acres
Townsend, DE
A rowdy crowd had gathered at Marklands Little Acres for “The Bloodiest Afternoon In Professional Wrestling” as the world’s premiere death match tournament was set to begin.
1ST ROUNDFans Bring the WeaponsAlex Colon def. Rickey Shane Page RSP, who normally performs for Cleveland’s AIW promotion, was this year’s special invitee. The fans welcomed him to the capital of ultraviolence. Colon was also making his ToD debut, so it promised to be an interesting contest. Colon got off to a fast start, blistering Page with kicks. Rickey rolled out of the ring to regroup but Alex followed, taking up one of the homemade weapons brought by the fans today: a snow shovel with a row of cheese graters fastened to it. Colon ripped Page across the back with the sadistic implement, causing him to holler in pain. Alex then took a crutch from someone in the front row and choked RSP against the barricade with it. As Page leaned against the railing coughing, Colon looked over the weapons spread out on the apron and picked up a dual staple gun that was put together with duct tape and started stapling Rickey’s flesh. Looking for another weapon, Alex found a cheap wall clock with tacks glued to it and raised it above his head but Page kicked him in the gut and took the weapon to use himself and clocked Colon with it. The two got back in the ring and fought over a hockey stick with the bigger Page getting control and crotching Colon with it. Alex next got choked with a length of garden hose. As Alex gagged, Rickey hit him with a Rolling Elbow and got a two count. Some back and forth action saw Page go for another Rolling Elbow with Colon kicking out. Alex got to use the hockey stick himself, setting up the Done Deal for a near fall. Going to the outside again, Colon sliced Page with a garden shears and blood began cascading down his face. Alex pushed a fan out of his seat and grabbed his chair but Ricky booted the chair into Colon’s face. The battle continued this way for a while more and the bloodied Page was visibly wearing down. Colon finished him with the Done Deal. The fans booed as he boasted about winning the whole tournament.
The rabid fans were awaiting another ultraviolent encounter but the next person to come out was Drew Gulak dressed in street clothes. The crowd completely sh*t on him and didn’t want anything to do with what he had to say. He repeatedly tried to speak but was drowned out by the fans with an occasional object flying into the ring. Drew pressed on and spoke about CTE (Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy) and that he had been concussed in each of his last two matches with Lucky tHURTeen. The heckling continued and a chant of “P*ssy!” started. When Gulak solemnly announced that he was going to have to retire, the crowd let out a big cheer. Drew looked out at them in disgust. Lucky came out, looking contrite. In the ring, he said something to Gulak and seemed to be apologizing. Drew said that Lucky had no reason to apologize and that this was just a reality of the wrestling business. Lucky hugged Drew and turned to leave. At that moment, Gulak clubbed Lucky with the microphone and started to lay the boots in on him. With his victim sufficiently subdued, Gulak grabbed a leg and put on an ankle lock, viciously twisting the appendage intent on inflicting injury. Ring crew and security broke up the situation and hauled Gulak to the back. As Lucky recovered, he tried getting to his feet but had trouble standing on his stricken ankle. Lucky’s scheduled 1st Round opponent, Joe Gacy, came out to the ring and insisted they start their match. CZW Vice President Maven Bentley tried talking Lucky out of going through with the match but he was having none of it.
Pits & LaddersJoe Gacy def. Lucky tHURTeenThere were shallow wooden boxes on each side of the ring filled with various sharp objects such as thumb tacks, glass, etc. There were also some step ladders available for the combatants to utilize. Lucky got the offensive initiative but his opening moves weren’t as effective as normal. Gacy started to take over but Lucky fired back. The fight spilled out of the ring where Gacy got a ladder slammed into his face. Lucky tried a Fosbury Flop but Joe caught him and gave him a backdrop driver against the ring apron. Lucky got rocked by a powerslam but Gacy was looking to inflict more punishment. Joe called for the ring crew to slide one of the pits into the ring. This one was filled with glass shards. He dropped Lucky into the pit and climbed the turnbuckle for a Top Rope Splash. He landed the move but once again didn’t try for the pin. He pulled Lucky up by the hair, revealing nasty gashes in his back from the glass, blood spilling out. He pushed Lucky face first into the corner and repeatedly chopped him on the back, aggravating the wounds. Lucky desperately fought back, taking Gacy over the top rope with a Frankensteiner. Joe landed in a pit full of thumb tacks. As Joe tried pulling tacks out of his arm, Lucky arranged a pair of ladders for his next move. He jumped from one, catching Gacy with a tilt a whirl piledriver onto the other. Blood began to seep from Gacy’s scalp. Back in the ring, Lucky had another pit put into the ring. This one was full of salt! Even though his ankle was giving him trouble, he was able to get Gacy up for a tombstone piledriver into the pit. Joe screamed as the salt got into his head wound. Lucky tried going to the ropes but stumbled on his bad leg. This left him open for a bicycle kick from Gacy who covered him for the three count. The commentary team speculated that things may have gone differently had Drew Gulak not injured Lucky prior to the match.
Light Tube CityDanny Havoc def. Matt TremontCZW World Heavyweight Champion, Havoc, met Tremont in what some anticipated to be the highlight match of the first round. Structures constructed of bundles of light tubes populated the ring, inside and out. This was going to be bloody. The two showed each other respect before Danny threw the first forearm to the face. Matt no sold it and answered with a headbutt that dazed Havoc. Each struggled to get the upper hand until it was Tremont whipping Havoc into the corner, crashing into one of the light tube constructions, Matt following with a splash against the buckles. Tremont executed a Sitout Powerbomb, then led the crowd in chanting.
“Hey... hey... hey!” Tremont headbutted Havoc twice with a light tube but Danny turned the tide with a throat drop on the ropes. Havoc hit General Order 24 then tossed Tremont over the top rope where he landed on a log cabin made of light tubes. Danny propped a arrangement of light tubes against the ring post and whipped Tremont into it. Matt soon had blood streaming down his face as he reactively swung his fists in the air. Danny put Matt through another batch of tubes before pushing him back into the ring. Havoc drove Matt into the glass covered canvas with his Q2QL3 DDT variant and covered him for the pin.
Windows Into PainMASADA def. DJ Hyde Deathmatch veterans Hyde and MASADA clashed in a ToD staple - a Panes of Glass Match. There was an intense stare down at first, then MASADA charged. DJ sidestepped him and he went crashing through a pane of glass in the corner. This one was off to a quick start! Hyde threw MASADA out of the ring where they traded blows. The advantage went back and forth with MASADA taking the brunt of the damage. To be honest, this was a sloppy match which just did not seem to go right. MASADA looked frustrated. He hit Hyde with a MASADAmizer and took it home after that with a Skullf*cka Buster. It was a lackluster performance that left the fans underwhelmed, with only one pane of glass broken and not one drop of blood spilled.
A behind the scenes montage played, showing each of the first round participants receiving medical attention for their cuts and punctures.. Usually this feature is a sphincter-clenching display but the wounds so far had been superficial. Rickey Shane Page had the worst laceration on his head and was getting stitches while Matt Tremont was having glass pulled out of his skin with tweezers.
SEMI-FINALS Saw Blades & Cinder BlocksJoe Gacy def. Alex Colon The battleground for this match sported a stack of cinder blocks in one corner, a sheet of plywood with semi-circle radial saw blades fastened to it, and 2x4s with similar blades attached. Gacy was the fresher man and attacked with fists to the face and rattled Colon with a powerbomb. Top Rope Splash by Gacy but like his previous match, he wasn’t ready to pin Colon yet, opting to inflict more pain. Joe bashed Alex in the chest with a cinder block then blasted him with a bicycle kick. Gacy picked up one of the boards and sawed into Colon’s bald head, making the blood flow. Alex made a brief comeback but Joe cut it short and tossed Colon through the ropes then picked up a cinder block and chucked it at him, knocking him to the ground. Backdrop driver, Top Rope Splash and Gacy pinned Colon who apparently had given everything he had in the first round.
Bed of Gusset PlatesDanny Havoc def. MASADA Aside from a smattering of weapons positioned around the ring area, the focal point of this match was resting against a barricade at ringside - a 4x8 sheet of plywood adorned with spiked gusset plates. Havoc and MASADA were two of the most experienced death match wrestlers in the world. These two recently faced each other in a Taipei Death Match for the CZW title with Havoc coming out on top. They cautiously circled each other for a few moments. MASADA made the first move with some routine shots in the corner and off of the ropes. Sensing the crowd getting anxious, MASADA pulled Danny out of the ring and cracked him over the back with a chair wrapped in barbed wire. “The Ultraviolent Beast” then ground the barbed wire into Havoc’s head. Blood started to drip down Danny’s face. Havoc got in a little offense but MASADA rammed his head into the ring post then clobbering him with a wiffle ball bat coated in thumb tacks. Back in the ring, Havoc took over and had MASADA down. He beckoned for the Bed of Gusset Plates to be moved into the ring. He hefted his opponent onto his shoulders, looking for General Order 24 onto the bed! MASADA frantically struggled against it and escaped. MASADA got the advantage and sent Danny over the top rope and through a lattice of pointy carpet strips. Havoc recovered and MASADA got a shot from the wiffle ball bat. Dragging MASADA back into the ring, Danny executed Total Havoc, landing the brainbuster on the gusset plates. The crowd let out an “OOOHH!!!” in response to the brutal spot. MASADA clutched his head that was now spurting blood and Havoc made the cover. Kick out at two. DDT by Havoc and another two count. Danny gave MASADA a pair of chair shots and went for General Order 24 again. Another kick out at two and the crowd was going nuts. The end came when Havoc set up the Bed of Gusset Plates on some chairs at ringside. With MASADA placed on the bed, Danny came off the top turnbuckle with an elbow drop. The bed collapsed and Havoc put an arm across MASADA’s chest with the ref making the final count. The fans gave a standing ovation for this epic war. MASADA redeemed his earlier performance and one could speculate that he had been saving himself for this match. The question was: what did Danny Havoc have left for the finals?
There was more backstage triage footage showing Danny Havoc and Alex Colon getting their wounds cleaned. MASADA got stitches for a particularly gruesome gash in his head from the gusset plates, with a little too many close ups from the camera man.
A scaffold was set up next to the ring. The crowd knew what it was time for and Devon Moore confirmed it when he came two-fisting bottles of Jack Daniels. The 2nd Annual Devon Moore Invitational Drunken Scaffold Match was about to begin. Moore got in the ring and introduced the other two participants for this years match.
“This first guy is a crazy motherf-- and I think he’s just doing it for the free alcohol - John Silver!” The brawny Silver marched out to the ring, amped up as usual.
“And this next guy needs no introduction but f- it - Sami Callihan!” The crowd went nuts as Sami came out.
“Let’s do this you sick bastards!”Devon Moore Invitational Drunken Scaffold MatchSami Callihan def. Devon Moore and John SilverSilver dumped Callihan out of the ring and went after Moore but Devon outfought him. Goin up the scaffold, Silver and Moore took a shot of whiskey. John started getting hyped up from the liquor but Moore just nonchalantly pushed him off of the scaffold. Moore then shrugged and jumped after Silver, hitting him with a Country Boy Press for the pin. SIlver was eliminated and Moore started looking around for Sami. He spotted Callihan sitting in the front row with the fans drinking beers. Moore told Sami to get his ass in the ring and Sami complied. Once between the ropes, Callihan charged, trying a flying tackle, but Devon caught him with an Ace Crusher and shouted “Nice try, cuz!” A second Ace Crusher and Moore got a two count. The ref took a shot of Jack. The wrestlers climbed the scaffolding and took a shot. Moore again took advantage and shoved Callihan off. Devon jumped after, clubbing Sami with an axe handle smash. Moore cut loose on Sami, taking breaks to have shots with the ref. Sami would reach up wanting a shot too only to have Devon go back to beating him up. Moore missed a Country Boy Press, letting Callihan take over on offense. The fists flew and the booze flowed as Sami battered Moore. Devon and the ref were pretty wasted at this point but Sami was trying to catch up. Callihan drunkenly tried to get Moore into the Stretch Muffler. He was successful in applying the move and Moore tapped out. After the bell, Moore stood up and glared at Sami for a few long moments then said
“I love you, man” and gave him a hug. The ref was moved by the display and tried getting in on the action.
“I love you guys.” He went to put his arms around them but they separated and the ref toppled between them, falling face first to the mat, passed out drunk. Sami and Dev staggered to the back, arms on each others shoulders.
FINALSBarbed Wire JungleJoe Gacy def. Danny HavocThe finals of ToD were set to take place in an unholy garden of barbed wire. Barbed wire was everywhere! Wrapped around the ringposts and turnbuckles, around the ropes, strung criss-cross from post to post (think Ultimate X or, shall we say, Ultraviolent X) , and boards wrapped in wire were set up outside the ring on all sides. It looked impossible to to do anything without getting tangled in the wire! As for the combatants, Gacy was clearly the fresher man, having had the easier path to the finals, coming through nearly unscathed. Havoc, on the other hand, looked like he had been to war. They opened the match, warily executing their moves, cautious of the wire. Gacy got the first real advantage. He unsteadily climbed the turnbuckles for a Top Rope Splash and, as he had been doing all day, pulled Havoc up before the ref could count. He climbed for a Top Rope Splash a second time, and got the easy pin. The fans booed the short and not so violent final match of the tournament. Gacy got pissed at the response and yelled
“You want blood?! I’ll give you blood!” He grabbed Havoc and whipped the CZW Champion into a section of ropes wrapped in barbed wire. The barbs tore at Danny’s skin and Gacy took a stray strand and dug it into Havoc’s face. The blood was flowing and Joe wiped his hand in it, holding it up for the crowd to see.
“Is this what you wanted?!” He pounded on Havoc then lifted him onto the top turnbuckle, tangling him in more wire. After struggling a moment to get position, everyone realized what Gacy was about to do. Dan Cowhey on commentary begged someone to stop him but it was too late. Gacy superplexed Havoc onto the X of barbed wire that crossed the ring. He looked to the crowd nodding then took ahold of Danny and yanked him down against the wire some more. Havoc’s Nation of Intoxication teammates, Devon Moore and Lucky tHURTeen raced out and Gacy bailed from the ring. As the NOI tried freeing Havoc, Gacy picked up the ToD trophy and had some final words.
“I got this and I’m coming for the CZW Championship next!”CZW Rankings- Danny Havoc
- Joe Gacy
- Andy Dalton
- Shane Strickland
- Greg Excellent
- Sami Callihan
- John Silver
- BLK Jeez
- MASADA
- Alex Colon
