Symptoms of The Universe

[Bri]

Mar 29, 2021 18:06:41 GMT -5 victoryroll84 said:

Mccant playing the organ is really funny (does he by chance use Undertaker's Phantom mask from 1995?) lol

The SOTU Tag Titles not being defended seems to raise some hairy questions on who could have beatdown the Road Warriors!

The Mountie and Deputy Foot will get down to the bottom of this I'm sure

Wildly creative as always Bri

Mornin victoryroll84!

That is an excellent touch (re: The Undertakers Phantom of The Opera Mask). You know he probably tried it - but he can only look so cool lol.

I agree, I am sure The Mountie & Bigfoot are on the case as to who rolled The Road Warriors.

I'd say they're gonna be very upset regardless.

Thanks my friend for your kind words amd for stopping by The SOTU!

3rd Monthly Report coming up next!

[Bri]

------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Symptoms of The Universe - Monthly Report
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

End of Third Month Report - (of the year Nineteen Something Something)


Special Note:

Due to a variety of reasons and situations (too many and much too strange to list here), a number of wrestlers (and all managers) have parted ways with The SOTU, some after Card 13.

(In some cases, challenges for roster spots were settled by internal matches with the winners getting those spots - it was pretty heavy).


The following represent the final rosters:


SOTU Ladies Division:
----------------------------------------------

▪  Judy Martin (Women's World Champion) (0 defenses)

▪  Cheerleader Melissa
▪  Fabulous Moolah
▪  Mildred Burke
▪  Sherri Martel
▪  The Atomic Punk (Thrash)
▪  Trish Stratus
▪  Wonder Woman (Amazonia)


SOTU Tag Team Division:
-----------------------------------------------------

▪  The Road Warriors (World Champions) (1 defense)

▪  Grindhouse (Ox Baker & Killer Kowalski)
▪  Miracle Violence Connection
▪  The Chosen Ones (Sur & Bex)
▪  Revenge (A Heathen & Astral Warrior)
▪  Rock N Roll Express
▪  The Superior Mothers (Thantos & Star
      Warrior)
▪  The Unbeatables (Overmaster & Thunder)


SOTU Mens Division:
------------------------------------------------

▪  Bobo Brazil (World Champion) (2 defenses)
▪  Curt Hennig (International Champion) (1 defense)

▪  Abdullah The Butcher
▪  A.J. Styles
▪  A Living Legend (Omega of Cetus)
▪  An Ordeal Most Unreal (Shayne)
▪  Barry Windham
▪  Blackjack Mulligan
▪  Brad Armstrong
▪  Bruiser Brody
▪  Bryan Danielson
▪  Buddy Rogers
▪  Captain America (Max Shield)
▪  Harley Race
▪  Ivan Koloff
▪  Jimmy Snuka
▪  Larry Zbyszko
▪  Lou Thesz
▪  Magnum T.A.
▪  Nick Bockwinkel
▪  Randy Savage
▪  Rob Van Dam
▪  Shred (Wolf)
▪  Sunshine Superman (Godsend)
▪  Ted DiBiase
▪  The Beast
▪  The Crusher
▪  The Impaler (Spike)
▪  The Masked Superstar
▪  The Sentinel (Endgame)
▪  The Uncrowned (Disaster)
▪  Tully Blanchard


SOTU Staff:
-----------------------------

▪  SOTU Principal Owner - Desperado (Sly
     Drury)

▪  SOTU Board of Directors - Director on The
     Board, Another Director on The Board and
     Yet Another Director on The Board. (They
     prefer to remain anonymous - for as long as
     possible)

▪  SOTU Commissioners - Sky Low Low, Little
     Beaver & Andre The Giant.

▪  SOTU Referees - The Unknown Soldier
     (Hector) Suror (Orrus The Unstoppable)

▪  SOTU Security And Investigations - The
     Mountie & Bigfoot

▪  SOTU CFO - Ted DiBiase

▪  SOTU Ladies Division Commissioner  -
      David Lee Roth

▪  SOTU Interview Show Host - Bill Murray

▪  SOTU Interview Show Sidekick - Harold
      Ramis

▪  SOTU / WWE (Worldwide Wrestling Empire)
      Double Agent & Spy - DAMN!!!

▪  SOTU Kinesiologist - Dr. John Dortmunder

▪  SOTU Assistant Kinesiologist - Dr. Edward
      Felson

▪  SOTU Intergalactic Incidents - The Mad
      Hatter (The Guardian) & Father Time
      (Tauran)

▪  SOTU Spiritual Advisor - Father Guido
      Sarducci

▪  Liason For The Entire Fourth (and now The
      Entire Third) Floors of The Broken Face
      Hotel - The Notorious Smallie Bigs - The
      Self Proclaimed Biggest Midget from
      Brooklyn...


Representing The World Wide Empire (WWE):
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

One Wrestler To Be Announced
Another Wrestler To Be Announced
Dusty Rhodes
Rampage (Monolith)
The Claw
The Shadow's Revenge
The Master Planner (The Dark Menace)


Representing The AWA:
----------------------------------------------

The Brain Basher
Unlimited


Out of The Arena Spotlight & Behind Closed Doors:

▪So GODSEND revealed himself (so to speak) to all of the "independent" wrestlers that have been transported and abandoned here on Earth. He told them that he couldn't care less about any of them and that they are all on their own, but it's all ok because, "I'M OVER YOU".

▪ A supremely powerful being from the year 2136 named Vallah truly tried to literally "reverse the curse" that GODSEND had cast here however, he couldn't. Although he proclaimed, to the independents, that GODSEND will now languish in prison forever,  the only thing Vallah could do was to apply a "counter curse" that "permanently sealed" all of these independents in the current SOTU time period - so there's no possibilities of reprocussions due to the independents revealing their true identities to our world.

▪ Little Beaver was tracked down by the independent wrestlers known as The Impaler (Spike), The Uncrowned (Disaster), A Heathen (Paganax), as well as The Mountie & Bigfoot.

▪ What then ensued was a knock down drag out fight between them and the two individuals who had kidnapped Little Beaver and were planning on holding him ransom, or worse - The Unbeatables - Unbeatable The First (The Aethran Overmaster) & Unbeatable The Second (Thunder).

▪ The Impaler (Disaster) was ultimately able to bring Unbeatable The First (The Aethran Overmaster) to his senses and force him to realize the truth.

▪ The truth being that Little Beaver is a hero on the planet Aethra because in a past life (aka a past fed), Little Beaver did what no one was previously able to do - injure Satan during a terrible war. On Aethra, Beav is also called The One Who Came Back, because he is the only one ever to have been able to escape Heaven and cheat death, in order to try and save others for their own sakes.

▪ According to Disaster, "The greatest memory jarrer that there is...is strangluation". Having now remembered the past, The Aethran Overmaster and Thunder (because he was told to) knelt before the SOTU braintrust and pledged loyalty, especially to Beav.

▪ A frustrated Desperado (Sly Drury) & Sunshine Superman (Godsend) tried to at least hook up with the very attractive groupie, but she told them to go scratch and split. Her real name was The Queen of The Night.

▪ The Unknown Soldier (Hector) caught up with Sunshine Superman and for insurance purposes, uttered those two words to him - "Afghanistan Bananastan" without most people being aware of it. These two words induced a hypnotic effect that rendered Godsend unable to utter his true identity of Godsend for the rest of his life.

▪ SOTU Staff Members - Dortmunder & Felson (Robert Redford & Paul Newman respectively), had told everyone that, "We told you so", insofar as whether or not the two words would work.

▪ The Atomic Punk (Thrash) was actually the one, (through a crisis of conscious), who was instrumental in allowing The Impaler (Spike) and The Uncrowned (Disaster) to find their fellow Aethran's and foil The Overmasters plot.

▪ Thrash properly apologized to The SOTU for her madness and role in the Overmasters scheme. It's understood that SOTU Ladies Commissioner David Lee Roth and Thrash have parted ways.

▪ SOTU Talk Show Host - Bill Murray came to the defense of his patient Abdullah The Butcher and said, "My Abby's heart was in the right place when he broke The Beast out of The Bronx Zoo...I'm so proud...sure he has to pay for the barge they sunk...but those two...scamps...are just misunderstood".

▪ Several fans have filed lawsuits against The SOTU for "physical and mental injuries they've supposedly suffered at SOTU events".

▪ The SOTU has now entered into a long term agreement with a ruthless law firm to defend them. The firm of Long, Slow, Loophole & Screw did so & vowed to continue defending us for as long - as we pay them.

▪ All of the owners, board of directors and commissioners after some serious negotiations, arguements and threats have basically come to a mutual understanding in light of all that's happened.

▪ A gentleman's agreement, led by Little Beaver, made with The Mayor of New York City - Hizzoner - Mayor Ned Krotch to, "Keep That Goddam Circus Under Control", easing the police.

▪ Spiritual Advisor Father Guido Sarducci approves of all...from his spiritual standpoint...and has also stated...that he now sells SOTU bras from his merchandise cart...as well...


SOTU Press Conference (In Front of Sunnyside Gardens Arena - Poor SOTU Spiritual Advisor Father Guido Sarducci never stood a chance):


"Is it true...that Wince McCan't is pulling out all of the stops...with WWE entrants into The Legends of The Universe Tag Team Challenge?..."

"My trench coats...are all still wai - ting..."

"Can anyone here please explain...why all of the thunderless lightning storms...have stopped...just as suddenly as they started?"

"You guys got any food?"...

"We heard that Howard Cosell will be joining Solie and Ventura as announcers for the big tournament at The Garden...any comment?"...

"Is Ox Baker seeing anybody?

"Does any team stand a chance at all...against that team of independent monsters the AWA signed?"...

"Does Howard Cosell...have any food?"...

"The Wicked Monk Bar & Restaurant is supposedly opening up a concession stand at The SOTU...is their sheppard's pie...really...that good?"...

"The Shadow's Revenge claims that The Sentinel...is in for the rudest awakening of his life...so just...what the hell...does that mean?"

"We agreed...that neither one of us...were going to interfere...this time...but...you...still... did"...

"Only a little...I couldn't resist"...

"Does anybody know what shoe size...Ox Baker wears?"...

"Will you have enough security for the tag tournament?"...

"Is there anything to the rumor...that within the last 24 hours...Harold Ramis has captured and neutered Bill Murray with a salad fork?"...


Card 13 - The Legends of The Universe Tag Team Challange - "Open To All Trying To Prove Themselves"...Final Listing:


1.  (A Chest & A Guest) - Brad Armstrong & Andre The Giant.

2.  (Handsome & Perfect) - Harley Race & Curt Hennig.

3.  (The Heenan Family) - Nick Bockwinkel & Crippler Stevens

4.  (The Kingdom) - (Godsend & Sly Drury).

5.  (Grindhouse) - Killer Kowalski & Ox Baker.

6.  (The Superior Mothers) - (Thantos & Star Warrior).

7.  (The Phenomenal Dragons) - A.J. Styles & Bryan Danielson

8.  (The Heavenly Express) - Bobby Eaton & Stan Lane

9.  (The Unbeatables) - Unbeatable The First (The Aethran Overmaster) & Unbeatable The Second (Thunder).

10.  (We Know Everyone's Secret) - The Unknown Soldier (Hector) & Suror (Orrus The Unstoppable)

11.  Representing The WWE (Indestructible) - Mercury (Matador of M83) & Atlas (Chaos The Indestructible)

12.  (Head Games) - Al Snow & Shane Douglas

13.  (The Midnight Bodies) - Tom Prichard & Dennis Condrey

14.  (The Sheepherders) - Luke Williams & Butch Miller

15.  (The Flying Redheads) - Red Bastien & Billy Red Lyons

16.  (The Rock N Roll Express) - Ricky Morton & Robert Gibson

17.  (The Family) - Blackjack Mulligan & Barry Windham

18.  (The Miracle Violence Connection) - Terry Gordy & Steve Williams

19.  (The Avengers) - Captain America (Max Shield) & The Sentinel (Endgame)

20.  SOTU World Tag Team Champions - (The Road Warriors) Hawk & Animal

21.  (The Chosen Ones) - God's Gift (Sur) & Ground Zero (Bex)

22.  (The Fantastics) - Bobby Fulton & Tommy Rogers

23.  (The Vachons) - Mad Dog Vachon & Butcher Vachon

24.  (The Foreign Legion) - The Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff

25.  (The Million Dollar Corporation) - Ted DiBiase & Bruiser Brody

26.  (Cane & Disable) - Justin Credible & The Sandman

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

27.  Representing The WWE (Black Death) - The Claw (Black Death Zygon) & The Shadows Revenge (Black Death Endgame)

28.  (The Misunderstood) - Abdullah The Butcher & The Beast (The Basilisk)

29.  Representing The AWA (The Gates of Hell) - The Brain Basher (Ghena) & Unlimited (End of Days)

30.  (Rest In Pieces) - The Astral Warrior (Harbinger) & Shred (Wolf)

31.  Representing The WWE (Legends of Nature) - Bruno Sammartino & Ric Flair

32.  (The King & I) - SOTU World Heavyweight Champion - Bobo Brazil & Lou Thesz


Coming up soon

16 First Round Match Announcements

(Due to a card that has 31 matches in one night - going to be posting announcements & results in 3 rounds)

Take care,

Bri!

Disclaimer: The SOTU reserves the right to not be responsible...for anything...

[Crossbones]

WoW! 31 matches in one night? This must be in an arena so big that 4 matches are going on at one time to get all those matches in with VR glasses that put the focus of the viewer on any match.

[TTX]

Nikki: "About time someone did something to Murray."
Amaranth: "Shall we start phase two?"
Eris: "Not quite yet, for there's a little more to phase one."

[topdollar]

Just found your fed, Bri!

Very creative--just like all your feds!

I'm putting my money on Phenomenal Dragons to win the Legends Of The Universe Tag Team Challenge!

Head Games , Cane & Disable, and Grindhouse are my favorite names. It's always fun creating names for new teams.

Looking forward to all the tournament action!

[cruefan68]

Ok that was awesome. I loved the last card but lounge singer Bill Murray had me rolling That was a true highlight, especially him channeling Jim Morrison lounge lizard style.

I will leave you with this my friend:

Hey, all you people that tryin' to sleep
I'm out to make it with my midnight creep, yeah

Because I'm a back door man
The men don't know
But the little girls understand
All right, yeah

You men eat your dinner
Eat your pork and beans
I eat more chicken
Than any man ever seen, yeah, yeah

Back Door Man by The Doors, a cover of the Howlin Wolf classic co-written by Willie Dixon.

[Bri]

Happy Saturday Everybody!

Apologies to all across the board - I'm incredibly behind in catching up on all the guaranteed awesomeness percolating in all me fellow promoters feds.

Seems always to come down to ebbs and flows, it's been a good busy lately on my side of the screen, but it's been busy.

Anywho, a thousand thank you's for the comments and the likes - fuel for the creative fires for sure:

Crossbones - As if you didn't know this already - I like the way you think brother. 4 rings at once would be like a pro wrestling Lollapalooza or something. But this tourney starts at 8pm tonight and goes one bout after the other. (And doesn't end until early Sunday).

TTX - It's gettin serious now, The Terrible Trio seem to be warmin up their cauldron of chaos. Just bound to spill over any moment now. I can't look...but tell me everything lol...Harold Ramis definitely has something up his sleeves...on Card 14's show...maybe we'll hear the skinny?

topdollar - Welcome brother man! I hear ya. I'm pullin for A Chest And A Guest & The King & I myself. Agreed, tag team name creating is pretty cool especially if you find something you dig. Show starts at 8pm tonight, truly hope it's a fun read!

cruefan68 - Very glad you enjoyed brother. And keep the Doors lyrics coming! I've got this one rumblin through my head right now, "Illegitimate Son Of A Rock And Roll Star...Illegitimate Son Of A Rock And Roll Star...Mom Met Dad In The Back...Of A Rock And Roll Car". Tonight's card name is indeed also words of The American Poet.

8pm tonight all the lean and mean results fall at once.

And now:


------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Symptoms of The Universe - News Report!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Card - 13


Live From Madison Square Garden
Manhattan, New York

The SOTU Legends of The Universe Tag Team Challange!

8pm Tonight


Scheduled Opening Round Tournament Match Announcements:


------------------------------------------------------------------------------


1.  (A Chest & A Guest) - Brad Armstrong &
Andre The Giant  vs  (The Foreign Legion) - The Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff

2.  (The Kingdom) - (Godsend & Sly Drury)  vs  (The Midnight Bodies) - Tom Prichard & Dennis Condrey

3.  (We Know Everyone's Secret) - The Unknown Soldier (Hector) & Suror (Orrus The Unstoppable)  vs  (The Vachons) - Mad Dog Vachon & Butcher Vachon

4.  (The Family) - Blackjack Mulligan & Barry Windham  vs  (The Rock N Roll Express) - Ricky Morton & Robert Gibson

5.  (The Miracle Violence Connection) - Terry Gordy & Steve Williams  vs  (The Flying Redheads) - Red Bastien & Billy Red Lyons

6.  (The Superior Mothers) - (Thantos & Star Warrior)  vs  (Cane & Disable) - Justin Credible & The Sandman

7.  (The Avengers) - Captain America (Max Shield) & The Sentinel (Endgame)  vs  (The Sheepherders) - Luke Williams & Butch Miller

8.  (The Chosen Ones) - God's Gift (Sur) & Ground Zero (Bex)  vs  (Head Games) - Al Snow & Shane Douglas

9.  (The Misunderstood) - Abdullah The Butcher & The Beast (The Basilisk)  vs. (Grindhouse) - Killer Kowalski & Ox Baker.

10.  (The Phenomenal Dragons) - A.J. Styles & Bryan Danielson  vs  (The Million Dollar Corporation) - Ted DiBiase & Bruiser Brody

11.  (The Unbeatables) - Unbeatable The First (The Aethran Overmaster) & Unbeatable The Second (Thunder)  vs  Representing The WWE (Legends of Nature) - Bruno Sammartino & Ric Flair

12.  (The Heavenly Express) - Bobby Eaton & Stan Lane  vs  Representing The AWA (The Gates of Hell) - The Brain Basher (Ghena) & Unlimited (End of Days)

13.  Representing The WWE (Black Death) - The Claw (Black Death Zygon) & The Shadows Revenge (Black Death Endgame)  vs  (The Fantastics) - Bobby Fulton & Tommy Rogers

14.  (Rest In Pieces) - The Astral Warrior (Harbinger) & Shred (Wolf)  vs  (Legends of The Fall) - Nick Bockwinkel & Crippler Stevens

15.  (The King & I) - SOTU World Heavyweight Champion - Bobo Brazil & Lou Thesz  vs  (Handsome & Perfect) - Harley Race & SOTU International Champion - Curt Hennig

16.  SOTU World Tag Team Champions - (The Road Warriors) Hawk & Animal  vs  Representing The WWE (Indestructible) - Mercury (Matador of M83) & Atlas (Chaos The Indestructible)


------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Special Notes:


Subsequent Rounds Will Be "1st Match Winner vs Second Match Winner etc"...


Fatigues will carry forward as each bout will occur one after the other until we have our tournament winners...


Hope to see you there!...group rates are available!...jus tell em Bri sent cha!...

[TTX]

It just builds up the anticipation, Bri both for your results and your comments on the various feds. Always worth it in the end.

[Crossbones]

My Picks: 

Opening Round Tournament Match Announcements:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1. (The Foreign Legion) - The Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff
2. (The Kingdom) - (Godsend & Sly Drury) 
3.  (The Vachons) - Mad Dog Vachon & Butcher Vachon
4. (The Rock N Roll Express) - Ricky Morton & Robert Gibson
5. (The Miracle Violence Connection) - Terry Gordy & Steve Williams 
6. (The Superior Mothers) - (Thantos & Star Warrior)
7. (The Avengers) - Captain America (Max Shield) & The Sentinel (Endgame) 
8. (The Chosen Ones) - God's Gift (Sur) & Ground Zero (Bex) 
9. (The Misunderstood) - Abdullah The Butcher & The Beast (The Basilisk)
10. (The Phenomenal Dragons) - A.J. Styles & Bryan Danielson 
11. (The Unbeatables) - Unbeatable The First (The Aethran Overmaster) & Unbeatable The Second (Thunder)
12. (The Gates of Hell) - The Brain Basher (Ghena) & Unlimited (End of Days)
13. Representing The WWE (Black Death) - The Claw (Black Death Zygon) & The Shadows Revenge (Black Death Endgame)
14. (Rest In Pieces) - The Astral Warrior (Harbinger) & Shred (Wolf) 
15. (The King & I) - SOTU World Heavyweight Champion - Bobo Brazil & Lou Thesz 
16. SOTU World Tag Team Champions - (The Road Warriors) Hawk & Animal

[victoryroll84]

JUST caught up Bri!

That snake in the grass Wince McCant would just love to infiltrate the LOTU Tag Team Challenge!....but does he have enough dough to bribe his way in?

I'm picking The Family to upset the Rock and Roll Express in the first round of the tournament (that's right I said it) lol

Looking forward to more zanyness Bri always a great time reading your results