|
|
Post by Bri on Oct 10, 2017 16:57:52 GMT -5
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (Month 4 Card 10 - Part 2 of 3)...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Vipers Pit - Episode 5:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
On today's show Pit introduced a brand new concept for Vipers Pit - a new experimental segment called - The LXG Against The Rest Of The World. A panel of three world political figures challenge The LXG in any form of Public or Political topic on camera debate.
The Challengers:
----------------------------
1. Current embattled mayor of New York City - Ned Krotch, who is trying desperately to get himself re-elected as well as regrow as much of his hair as possible.
2. Wife of a former candidate for President of The United States and the very person who spearheaded the campaign to have parental advisory labels put on albums and compact discs after being so thuroughly disgusted and offended by - several - viewings of Van Halen's Hot For Teacher video - Clipper More.
3. Nossir Araflat - More than likely - the only hermaphroditic dictator and terrorist on Earth.
Defending The LXG:
---------------------------------
1. LXG Head of Public Relations - The ever confident and incredibly crafty Lounge Lizard King - Bill Murray.
2. LXG Co-Owner - The always benevolent pure soul and definitely the heart of The LXG - Little Beaver
3. LXG Master of All Trades & Extremely Loud Secret Weapon - Ron Simmons.
Pit Viper - Ok challengers, you know the rules...first one to buzz in throws out the first question to The LXG...Go!!
Mayor Krotch - (Immediately buzzes in, closes his eyes, clenches his fists and screams to everybody) - WHERE THE HELL ARE ALL OF THE DAMN BRONX ZOO ALIENS!!!!
Bill Murray - (Puts one of his hands on his chest in a slight pause, closes his eyes and says) -You know Ladies and Gentlemen...I for one am so relieved that our fearless leader...Mayor Krotch has bravely brought this issue immediately to light...I am so proud to announce that under Ned Krotch's directive...the Infamous Bronx Zoo Aliens were all tagged with microchips in their necks during their sleep cycles...and purpously allowed to escape.
Mayor Krotch - (his face calms some...but in confusion and one eyebrow raises).
Bill Murray - (points to Krotch and says) - This... brilliant man...is letting the aliens themselves...im their own folly..
lead us directly to...their Mothership where batallions of Bronx Special Forces will apprehend them all...Ladies and Gentlemen...may I also humbly add...that come this November...if you want to vote for The True Leader...True Head...of New York City...then the choice is perfectly clear you MUST...CHOOSE...THE MAN...THE LEGEND...THE KROTCH!!!
(The two headed owner of The Bronx Zoo, who was watching from home - spoke emotionally to himself):
Lefty - Damn he's good...did you see the single tear roll down Murray's check when he raised his fist up at the end?
Righty - He's beyond good...I think I even believe this...he even pulled us out of our nose dive...
Clipper More - (Frantically buzzes in and says) - Yes all well and good - so how can any of you explain, let alone defend the rampant chauvinism and bombastic female exploitation that has festered and grown to an unholy proportion in this God forsaken cesspool of existence called The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen where you have even stooped to hire the accursed lead singer of Van Halen as your hedonistic ringmaster in this Absolute Circus of Debauchery!!!!
Ron Simmons - (Stares up at the ceiling and says directly to Clipper More) - DAMN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Clipper More shreiks at the top of her lungs in horrific fear at the brain breaking volume of Ron Simmons and winds up throwing her full ceramic LXG mug of coffee straight up in the air...as the mug crashes onto the table and splatters everybody with coffee - Little Beavers' special Ron Simmons translator phone ap transiates Ron and says in a mellow monotone metallic voice):
Phone Ap - WE CAME HERE TO DISCUSS POLITICS AND IMPORTANT SOCIAL ISSUES THAT EFFECT THE VERY FABRIC OF OUR LIVES AND YOU HAVE TURNED THIS INTO SOME SORT OF SELF INDULGANT WITCH HUNT SIMPLY TO PLACATE YOUR OWN REPULSIVE VANITY SIMPLY BECAUSE NOBODY HAS WANTED TO EXPLOIT YOU SINCE THE EIGHTIES - OH AND BY THE WAY WE EMPLOY A NUMBER OF LADIES AT THE LEAGUE - ONE OF WHICH IS A TITLE HOLDER AND HAS MADE ALL OF US VERY PROUD.
(Clipper More wasnt prepared for such a rebuttle...as she was about to try defend her position with a powerful - Oh Yeah? Ron beat her to the punch):
Ron Simmons - DAMN!!!!!!!!!
Phone Ap - MY MOTHER ONCE TOLD ME THAT THE ONLY WORSE THING YOU COULD DO TO A WOMAN THAN TREAT HER LIKE A SEXUAL OBJECT - IS TO NOT TREAT HER LIKE ONE - BEFORE WE DISCUSS THIS ANY FURTHER - PIT I PROPOSE THAT MS. MORE REALLY NEEDS TO TAKES A TIME OUT IN THAT PHONE BOOTH AGAINST THE WALL - SO SHE CAN COMPOSE HERSELF - AND REFLECT FOR A MOMENT.
(Pit turns to stare briefly at this phone both which quite frankly, he hadn't noticed before)
Pit Viper - You know something...Ronnie's got a point and since I'm the mediator on my show - Ms. More, if you will please - 2 minites in the penalty box here please - then we can we can daiscuss this more rationally.
(At first Clipper More was offended, but since she now feels somewhat unglued, to sit for two minutes in that phone booth there actially might give her the chance to plan a counter attack).
(Little Beaver saw Ron was smiling as Cheech Marin politely lead her to the phone booth, but he too had never noticed that odd looking phone booth there either...)
(Then Little Beaver realized to himself - thats not a phone booth! That's that orgasmatron that Sky had built anyway - he even called it Spinal Tap - because this one goes to 11).
Little Beaver - (Stands Up and Emphatically Starts Waves his hands saying) - NO! NO! NO! NO NO...NO!...NO! Thats not..
(And here marks the great moral dilemma faced by Beavie here, he paused and found himself looking at his fellow LXG panel - Ron was smiling, Cheech, Chong and Pit Viper were absolutely confised and shrugging their shoulders at each other).
Little Beaver - Thats not...(then he thought about what she said about the League and all of them and especially what she said about Diamond Dave, who is just as much a brother to him as Sky is - and then he finally he locked eyes with Bill Murray - who simply closed eyes for a second, opened them and then slightly smirked).
Little Beaver - That's not......a bad...idea.
(Pit signalled for Cheech to continue escorting Clipper More into the phone booth, Cheech and Clipper both made mental observations that this was the first phone booth you could actually sit down in that has a seat belt?).
(As the Orgasmatron roared to life once it senses someone in its ergonomically correct love chair upon the door closing, some gasping and moaning started emit from inside).
Bill Murray (speaking to a still somewhat devided in thought Little Beaver) - It's ok Beavie...we're not making her do this...she needs this...
(Ron Simmons and Bill Murray high five each other as Little Beaver slowly rests his head in his hands...Nossir Araflat...who hasn't said one word - had been busy playing footsie with both Clipper More and himself under the table...being a man of adjustment...he continued playing footsie with himself and started to take his buzzer apart with a substantially long dagger - even through the occassional electric shock from the still coffee soaked buzzer).
(Several times from within the orgasmatron the following could be heard):
whoa Whoa WHOOOOAAAAA!
(With each one of these cycles, Bill Murray was making slash marks on his LXG Notepad, when she emitted the 6th and final WHOOOOAAAAA! it actually sounded more like Ric Flairs' WOOOOOOOO! and Ron raised both of his arms straight up in the air signaling a touchdown - which for the first time make Beavie lose it and crack up).
(As the door to the orgasmatron opened up so all the steam could emit and Cheech slowly led the bad hair day, sweat soaked, smeared her own make up, fingers in her mouth, 30 IQ points lighter Ms. More back to her seat, Cheech noticed something strewn on the bottom of this awesome phone booth).
(After escorting the wobbly legged More back To her seat, he said to Chong in a low voice:
Cheech - Hey man...that cranky lady tore her own panties to shreds man.
Chong - Really...Thats Heavy man...And Weird...It's...Weavy...I'm not too sure how I feel about this man.
Cheech - Yeah...well I do man...you got any quarters Holmes...I REALLY need to go make a shit load of calls.
Pit Viper - (after being filled in by Murray about the true nature of this particular phone booth):
Pit Viper - Ladies and Gentlemen...I think it safe to say that everything happens for a reason or even reasons...and before we order some scrumptious Chinese food...several things should be noted; The LXG is 1 and 0 with The LXG Against The Rest of The World...this proves without a shadow of a doubt (as Ron slips a piece of paper in front of Pit that says - theres a camera recorder inside), that God definitely is...a Van Halen fan. Oh and remember to go phone somebody special tonight - Make Sure To Reach Out And Touch Someone...Goodnight All! - P.S. And Always Buckle up for safety!...
Coming Soon - Month 4 - Card 10 - Part 3 of 3:
Matches 5-7, Fly on the Wall Reports and Match Announcements for Card 11.
|
|
|
|
Post by Pariah on Oct 10, 2017 20:34:05 GMT -5
Haha! The LXG strikes gold with Viper's Pit yet again.... DAMN!!!!!!!!!
All this talk about bad vibes within the fed, has to make fans wonder if The Wicked Monk has a good reason to be worried... Perhaps something followed Father Jonathan and company out of that fog...
Awesome stuff, as always!
|
|
|
|
Post by Bri on Oct 10, 2017 22:25:15 GMT -5
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (Part 3 of 3)...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Month 4 - Card 10 - Match Results:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
5. Bishop Hell & Morpheus vs Antonio Inoki & Rikidozan:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Having seen his son in the first row for the first time in a very llong time, Morpheus was very energized for this contest and quite frankly was a war machine, Bishop Hell nor Antonio Inoki even made it into the ring in this fast 6 minute match. Morpheus dominated Rikidozan including preventing him from tagging out and finishing him off quickly with his TRIP TO HADES - A Powerslam After Propelling Himself Off The Ropes.
*Bishop Hell & Morpheus defeat Antonio Inoki & Rikidozan via Pinfall*
(Bishop Hell & Morpheus +46 / Antonio Inoki & Rikidozan -67).
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
6. Semi Final Match - The Lords of Flatbush Tournament: The Unpredictables - (Johnny Gargano, Jay Lethal, Alex Koslov & Rocky Romero) vs The Black Widows - (Sherri Martel, Cheerleader Melissa, Trish Stratus & LXG Television Champion - Penny Banner):
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
First Fall - With both teams striving to score first blood and get the first elimantion - The Black Widows strike first as Cheerleader Melissa Pins Alex Koslov courtesy of her KUDOH DRIVER - A Back To Back Double Underhook Piledriver.
Second Fall - The Unpredictables come out strong against the Widows, this time with much better teamwork. They wind up evening the score by Johnny Gargano forcing LXG Television Champion Penny Banner to submit to his GARGANO ESCAPE - A Chickenwing Over The Shoulder Crossface.
Third Fall - After a long fall where now both sides were increasing their tag effectiveness, Jay Lethal took his offense to the next level and via his LETHAL INJECTION - A Handspring Cutter which enabled him to pin Cheerleader Melissa.
Fourth Fall - This time Jay Lethal eliminated another Black Widow, although she fought hard, Trish Stratus had no choice, after absorbing multiple chair shots and having her face cracked open badly on one of the ring posts, to submit to Jay Lethals KOJI CLUTCH.
Fifth Fall - Jay Lethal continued his assault and wound up eliminating the final Black Widow, Sherri Martel via his Lethal Combination - An STO Backbreaker followed by a Reverse STO.
*The Unpredictables Advance To The Tournament Final Match to face the winner of Death & Dismemberment (Steen, Elgin & The Road Warriors) vs Damage Incorporated (The Sheik, Sabu, Bruiser Brody & LXG World Champion - Rob Van Dam)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
7. Black Death Wrestler - Harbinger with Abroz vs Bigfoot with Plethador:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Abroz and Plethador both convinced and agreed to some serious stakes for this match - No Disqualifications, Double Ratings Points & No Time Limt.
The dazzling and overwhelming offense in this match belonged to Bigfoot, some highlights were: Picking Harbinger up off the ground and slamming him back first into a stone column and actually putting a noticable crack in the column, Harbinger picking Bigfoot up and throwing him across the ring only for Bigfoot to land on his feet and rush Harbinger Backhanding him into the turnbuckle and Harbinger surviving Bigfoots ABDUCTED finisher where he sits on your chest and Hammer Fists you within an inch of your life.
Harbingers amazingly rebounded with both of his finishers, SOUL TAKER & PORTENT OF DOOM - A Spinebuster off the Ropes & Brainbuster Onto The Top Turnbuckle respectively.
At about the 30 minute mark Harbinger hit Bigfoot with his Skull Slayer - A Clothesline for the three count.
*Harbinger defeated Bigfoot via Pinfall*
Harbinger moved towards Plethador who rushed into the ring to help Bigfoot but Bigfoot grabbed Harbingers ankle and flipped him onto his spine and emitted an unearthly prehistoric growl that not only froze Harbinger but convinced Abroz to get both he and his wrestler away from this thing.
(Harbinger + 72 / Bigfoot -97).
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Fly On The Wall Reports:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1 of 3 - Lady Evil (She's Queen of the Night):
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The scene is from inside a dimly lit room - inside a very dark apartment about 5 blocks away from The LXG Arena, a man is speaking to an apparition of a sultry dangerously attractive woman wearing a long black hooded cloak...speaking from Castilex...in a place just south of Witches Valley...
Woman - So...Sly Drury.
Thantos - He is here...with most of Martial Law...and your wrestlers...they want to stay here.
Woman - Epoch?
Thantos - He...is also here. He has created a schism within Drurys universal crime family - The Maffei...and has convinced half of Drury's made men...to join with him.
Woman - Interesting...What of The Aethrans?
Thantos - An impending civil war is on the horizon...and there are at least two new players now involved.
Woman - Who?
Thantos - One who wears a mask and seems to have an affiliation with Havoc...the other is from the now defunct NAWC...his name is Calm...and he is also...one of the so called...New Aethran Empire...actually three new players involved...Thrash is pregnant.
Woman - Really...this volitile situation just go much more complicated...which Aethran is the father?
Thantos - A non Aethran...Thrash and Homicide both profess that Homicide is the father...but it may be someone else.
Woman - Who?
Thantos - Someone she has been having an affair with behind Homicides back...a new Wrestler named Witness?
Woman - Kinky.
Thantos - They make midnight clandestine love in Cannonball Park, a park adjacent to The LXG.
Woman - Extremely Kinky...Keep me posted.
Thantos - (smiling slightly) - Done.
Woman - There was a ship from Cetus in orbit that stalked our reconnaissance team on Earths Moon...is there a Cetus presence there at The LXG?
Thantos - Omega himself is here
Woman - Really....
Thantos - as well as Bloodline now.
Woman - There is a very strong tie between Cetus and Earth.
Thantos - Yes.
Woman - There are also many militant tribes.
Thantos - Countries.
Woman - On Earth...much more than we...anticipated.
Thantos - Yes...but many do not trust each other...at all...they can be turned against eachother...quite...easily
Woman - What about McCan't?
Thantos - I have arranged for him to compete in a commissioners tournament...he's a simpleton...but he will be an important pawn for us...and I have him completely under my thumb.
Woman - We are sending to The LXG three wrestlers we had capured from the planet Vampir and converted...we need you to...manage their affairs...as well as them.
Thantos - Who?
Woman - The tag team known as The Kindred, Stephen and Mallick DeArcher...and also Sammael The Mourningstar.
Thantos - So the wrestlers you're sending me...are vampires?...Vampires...are uncontrollable.
Woman - Not to The Dominion...they aren't...however...we do need you to keep a special watchful eye...on Sammael.
Thantos - Dare I ask...Why?
Woman - Sammael is very powerful...and unfortunately...he is also akin to...a virus...once you believe you have a solution for him...he mutates his way around it.
Thantos - You say virus...I say he sounds more like...a disease.
Woman - Make no mistake - your cooperation in our imminent endeavors...will not go unnoticed...so tell me...how did you discover so much...in so fast a time...down there?
Thantos - I'm the man...
Queen of The Night - Mmmnnn.......
Thantos - Now...remember...when I break The LXG...and that sets up this invasion....
Queen of The Night - You want to be sole ruler of Cetus...we know...now YOU remember something...we do not like...to be...disappointmented...(and then her apparition disappears).
Thantos - (thinking out loud) - She is by far the most powerful being in the universe...I am going to have to hedge my bets here...we haven't spoken in some time but - I am going to have to call...father...and start recruiting.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2 of 3. Exit Stage Left:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The scene is the brand new gothic/punk kinky bar and live rock music nightclub, (owned by Coven Black, that is staffed with Blacks 27 gorgeous valets), its called Blacks Coven:
Kill Prey - You'll never guess...who approached me?
Epoch - (downs his straight up Tequila) - Who?
Kill Prey - Fhanna
Epoch (starting to smile) - So...did you approach her back?
Kill Prey - Oh Yeah...several times...she's very approachable.
Epoch - So...does she think you're going to
Kill Prey - Most definitely...How do you want to handle this?
Epoch - Let her think you're on her team.
Kill Prey - Thats what I figured you'd say.
Epoch - But never tip your hand...unless you tell me first...oh and also...forget about the missing Swami...we're not going to need him...Drury can keep him.
Kill Prey - What?...How is that possible?
Epoch - Turns out I just had a meeting with someone who figured out a way to harvest a much better product...even better than Swami's Stash.
Kill Prey - This guy must be something else.
Epoch - In the words of his associate...
He's got Mad Skills Yo.
Kill Prey - Whats his name?
Epoch - Bryan Cranston, he and his associate Aaron Paul manage an LXG tag team - Lance Hoyt and Ox Baker...and may start managing others.
Kill Prey - Wait...those actors?...why would they want to get involved with this?
Epoch - I asked them the very same thing.
Kill Prey - And?
Epoch - They said because we have the perfect front for it - and we're also very good at it.
Kill Prey - More actors to deal with.
Epoch - All the universe...is indeed a stage...my friend.
Kill Prey - Whatever...gotta run...Ive got some approaching to do.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
3 of 3 - Plethadors Office:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The scene is Plethadors office at about 11pm - we see Trish Stratus taking a luxurious bubble bath in the oversized bathtub Plethador uses to rehydrate himself. She is leaning back against the wall, with her head back and her eyes closed, in a total relaxed and mellow state.
Suddenly a cell phone, thats next to a bottle of Smirnoff and a container of instant Tang mix on the side of the tub, starts to ring...the ring tone is Van Halen's song Unchained.
The water inside the bubble bath starts to splash around and Roth's head emerges from beneath the water wearing l swimmers goggles and goes to answer the phone as Stratus exhales in frustration.
David Lee Roth - Yeah...
Sky Low Low - We got problems...we're calling an emergency meeting
David Lee Roth - (takes a sip from his Tang Screwdriver and locks eyes on Stratus) - Oye...
Sky Low Low - Are you in the middle of anything?
(Trish Stratus overhears this and smiles slightly with her eyes still closed).
David Lee Roth - (Scratches his head) You could say that...I'll be there in 15
(At this point Stratus opens her eyes and shakes her head signifying no)
David Lee Roth - 30...30 minutes.
(Stratus now shakes her head to signify yes just before she sips her drink...Roth hangs up his phone and he and Stratus lock eyes and smile).
David Lee Roth - So...where were we?
(Trish Stratus gently places both of her hands on the sides of Roth's head...and then slowly pushes his head back under the water).
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Month 4 - Card 11 - Match Announcements:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1. The French Angel vs Snafu with Plethador.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2. The Kindred - Stephen & Mallick DeArcher with Thantos vs Nature Boy Buddy Rogers & Gorgeous George with Cherie Dupre.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
3. Encubus with Thantos vs Jay Briscoe.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
4. Adam Cole & Adam Pearce vs Torin Caelum & Commander Sam.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
************ Vipers Pit - Episode 6 ************
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
5. Black Death Wrestler - Sur with Abroz vs Tombstone.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
6. Stone Cold Steve Austin vs. Lou Thesz - No Disqualification, No Time Limit - 2 out of 3 Falls
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
For additional background and stuff please visit the LXG folder in the LOW Titles history thread, will be an ongoing update as a preface to The Only The Strong Survive Tournaments.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A League of Extraordinary Gentlemen...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
Post by cruefan68 on Oct 11, 2017 16:25:41 GMT -5
More awesome action from LXG! Ned Krotch and Clipper More had me rolling, not to mention Bill Murray and a DAMN! from Ron Simmons! Congrats to The Unpredictables on advancing to the finals of the Lords of Flatbush tourney. You know I wanted Antonio Inoki & Rikidozan to win but I'm not too sad seeing one of my GWF faves, Bishop Hell, on the winning side. Also sad to see Bigfoot lose but what are you going to do? So much action and intrigue going on in LXG, amazing. Keep doing what you are doing my friend and I will be taking the highway to the END OF THE NIGHT on my way home from another LXG show.
|
|
|
|
Post by Bri on Oct 12, 2017 17:11:59 GMT -5
Piper doesn't need a machine gun to win but clever use of his teeth to escape. Surprise win by Whitmer and Martinez as Andre and Rhodes just go wild and Bloodline is too good for Superstar t his day. Hey TTX! Piper vs Destroyer was really an excellent match. Never used Whitmer & Martinez until this first time but Dusty just snapped - with Rhodes and Sullivan on opposite sides of this feud - I'm hoping its as disturbing as it should be. Bloodline is a dynamo for me - as far as I'm concerned theres no limit on how far he will go in The Only The Strong Survive Tournament. Thanks man!! |
|
|
|
Post by Bri on Oct 12, 2017 17:19:19 GMT -5
I loved the description of DLJ breaking out of the Camel Clutch of the Iron Sheik. Too bad for Father DLJ that he couldn't win it though instead having to settle for a draw. Masked Superstar vs. Bloodline sounded amazing. I was pulling for the Superstar but he gave it a solid effort. Another Kevin Sullivan crew gets a DQ win, go figure. Andre the Giant & Dusty Rhodes could have used the win but it would be cool to see a rematch. I absolutely loved seeing the "Hot Rod" get a hard fought win over The Destroyer in the main event. Great show my friend and just so you know I had my eyes on the road and my hands upon the wheel as I drove home from the show  Weeellll I woke up dis moanin and I had my self a beer! Love the Doors flavored comments cruefan68! I know I was really pulling for Father DLJ to take that one - really solid match all around. Kevin Sullivan is involved with I think at least two feuds now, maybe 3! I gotta check me file. Hot Rod fought him tooth and nail thats for sure. I predict he is going to be a big problem in The LXG Universe Champion Tournament. The futures uncertain and the end is always near...let it roll...awll night long. Damn I love that band. Thanks Crue!! |
|
|
|
Post by Bri on Oct 12, 2017 17:30:55 GMT -5
Haha! The LXG strikes gold with Viper's Pit yet again.... DAMN!!!!!!!!! All this talk about bad vibes within the fed, has to make fans wonder if The Wicked Monk has a good reason to be worried... Perhaps something followed Father Jonathan and company out of that fog... Awesome stuff, as always! Hey Pariah! Thanks very much for the praise my friend! Pit Vipers should pull its weight, we are paying him a fortune! More soon to be revealed with exactly what happened around those two islands (Hoffman & Swinburn). Some-things wicked this way comes. Afghanistan Bananastan has called a Deluxe meeting to attempt to find some solutions to everything they are faced with. I really hope everyone finds something to enjoy out of this conveyer belt of chaos called The LXG. Things are slowly going to get international and then even universal. I am having a blast with this - true therapy for me. I have a lot going on personally and its nice to be able to go to The LXG and convey all of the happenings. Very grateful for all of you guys and this community. Oh Snap! I just remembered I have to submit my entry for the FTR contest. (Just going to use who I did last time - I think). Thanks my friend! |
|
|
|
Post by Bri on Oct 12, 2017 17:42:02 GMT -5
More awesome action from LXG! Ned Krotch and Clipper More had me rolling, not to mention Bill Murray and a DAMN! from Ron Simmons! Congrats to The Unpredictables on advancing to the finals of the Lords of Flatbush tourney. You know I wanted Antonio Inoki & Rikidozan to win but I'm not too sad seeing one of my GWF faves, Bishop Hell, on the winning side. Also sad to see Bigfoot lose but what are you going to do? So much action and intrigue going on in LXG, amazing. Keep doing what you are doing my friend and I will be taking the highway to the END OF THE NIGHT on my way home from another LXG show. Hey Cruefan68! I tell ya Ned Krotch needs to be pacified because of all the complaints received about The LXG Aliens, A Vampire and at least one Zombie (although some saw a female Zombie with Gustav one night!) But they got Clipper More right where they want her - with that 2 minute multi Whoa experience captured on film from within the Orgasmatron - Dave wants to use it as leverage to have all parental advisory labels removed for starters. A blurry faced 2 minute erotic film called - A Tail of Whoa may start to make its way onto the dark web - proceeds going to charity as well. The Unpredictables I think are going to have their hands full with which ever one of the teams wins the last semi final match - Steen, Elgin, Hawk & Animal vs. The Sheik, Brody, Sabu & Van Dam. Jay Lethal is a real beast though. We shall see amigo. A Feast of Friends is what I'm shootin for here Crue! |
|
|
|
Post by Bri on Oct 14, 2017 11:49:21 GMT -5
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A League of Extraordinary Gentlemen...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Month 4 - Card 11 - Match Results:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1. The French Angel vs Snafu with Plethador:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Deperate for a win, The French Angel comes out full tilt power brawling and almost immediately starts receiving warnings from the referee. After the stunned Snafu breaks out of The Angels BEAR HUG, The Angel goes too far via multiple Steel Chair shots outside the ring drawing a disqualification at just about the 3 minute mark.
*Snafu defeats The French Angel via Diswualification*
As Plethador sweeps The Angels legs stopping the assault, security seperates all and escorts the frustrated 0 - 4 foaming at the mouth French Angel back to the locker rooms. Plethador tries to help his wrestler and patient by getting him bandaged up and encouraging him with the win but the self sabotaging Snafu says I won but I didn't beat him - just before he starts punching himself in the face.
(Snafu +24 / The French Angel -148).
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2. The Kindred - Stephen DeArcher & Mallick DeArcher with Thantos vs Nature Boy Buddy Rogers & Gorgeous George with Cherie Dupre :
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thantos was at first concerned as Rogers and George put on a solid display of scientific wrestling and excellent tag work but once The Kindred got settled and into a grove, they took over and never looked back. Even with a key distraction from Dupre and a dramatic all four men in the ring brawl, at the 9 minute mark Stephen DeArcher pinned Gorgeous George via his primary finisher - DIES IRAE DIES ILLA, an Impaler Driver as his brother Mallick Chokeslammed Buddy Rogers before he could interfere.
*The Kindred defeat Buddy Rogers & Gorgeous George via Pinfall*
Thantos was relieved at how easy it was to Manage The Kindred, The Queen of the Night was right, The Dominion can handle vampires...well he thought most vampires anyway. Sammael was already giving him problems. Rogers and George started blaming each other for the loss as Dupre was trying not to be noticed as she was passionately checking out The Kindred, telling her team - yeah whatever as they complained to her all the way back to the locker rooms.
(The Kindred +44 / Rogers & George -66).
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
3. Encubus with Thantos vs Jay Briscoe:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
While Encubus absolutely had no trouble suprisingly with Jay Briscoe, Thantos seemed miles away and in the future in thought. Encubus had fun bringing Briscoe to the brink of loss in this 12 minute one sided affair via his tertiary and primary finishers, MAFFEI MASTERLOCK and SECOND COMING, his versions of the Figure Four Leglock and a Dropkick Into The Turnbuckle followed by a Bulldog respectively. But it was his GAMEMASTER DDT that took the rest of the fight out of Briscoe.
*Encubus defeated Jay Briscoe via Pinfall*
His son, thought Thantos needed this victory to get dug in, especially before the Only The Strong Survive Tournaments begin. The Kindred looked fantastic, now he has to get a handle on Sammael. As Encubus pandered to his new largely female fans, a man wearing a hooded long grey cloak spoke with Thantos at ringside.
(Encubus +42 / Jay Briscoe +52).
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
4. Adam Cole & Adam Pearce vs Torin Caelum & Commander Sam:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
An amazingly short match, Adam Cole wanted no part of the just as agile but much stronger Torin Caelum and quickly tagged out to Adam Pearce. Before Adam Pearce could tag out to escape Caelums technical dominance, Caelum trapped Pearce in his CAELUMS GRIP finisher - a nasty Cobra Clutch which forced Pearce to Submit at not even 2 minites as Commander Sam stopped Adam Cole dead in his tracks with a Left Hook.
*Torin Caelum & Commander Sam defeat Adam Cole & Adam Pearce via Submission*
Enraged - Cole and Pearce sneak attacked Caelem and Sam a few seconds after the match. The two Adam's tossed Commander Sam out of the ring and started double teaming Caelum. Suddenly the two Adam's fled as Commander Sam re-entered the ring with fire in his eyes and started blasting them in the heads with a Red White and Blue painted Steel Chair he had hid under the ring.
(Torin Caelum & Commander Sam +50 / Adam Cole & Adam Pearce -50).
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Due to technical difficulties - Episode 6 of Viper's Pit is postponed until the next card.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
5. Black Death Wrestler - Sur with Abroz vs Tombstone:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A ferocious 18 minute match that captivated the crowd as both the egomaniacal Black Death wrestler Sur and the genetic clone of The Undertaker named Tombstone unleashed some of the most devastating offense and jaw dropping resilience seen in The LXG so far. Tombstone withstood the power technical brilliance of Sur including physically breaking out of Sur's GIFT OF THE GODS finisher - A Camel Clutch - three times. Likewise Sur kicked out and forced a rope break of Tombstones LAST RIDE and DEVILS TRIANGLE - A Delayed Elevated Powerbomb and a Modified Gogoplata respectively. After winning an epic brawl outside the ring, Sur went for the cover after hitting Tombstone with his Perfect Powerbomb, and pins Tombstone who kicked out within a fraction of a second too late.
* Black Death Wrestler - Sur defeats Tombstone via Pinfall*
(Sur +80 / Tombstone -38)
After the match, T.V. announcers Jim Solie and Gorilla Ventura argued over the circumstances on how the match was won. Upon replay Jim Solie pointed out, Sur had placed one of his feet on the ring post to use as much needed leverage to score the three count whereas Gorilla Ventura defended Sur saying Jim you're just upset because Sur is a genius and that it's not his fault the ring post was there. Jim Solie just stared back at him.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
6. Stone Cold Steve Austin vs. Lou Thesz - No Disqualification, No Time Limit - 2 out of 3 Falls:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
First Fall - An 18 minute battle comprised of Austin repeatedly brawling and using his unique brand of power moves whereas Thesz often reversed Austins offense and tied him up with many painful near Submission holds. But coming back from behind, Stone Cold hits Thesz with his STONE COLD STUNNER out of nowhere to score the Pinfall.
Second Fall - A 12 minute back and forth effort that showed how resilient Lou Thesz was as he kicked out of Austins Diving Elbow Drop and even his STONE COLD STUNNER twice, but ultimately Austin puts away Thesz with a debilitating Spinebuster Slam for the second Pinfall and the victory.
*Stone Cold Steve Austin defeated Lou Thesz 2 Pinfalls to None*
From his ringside seat, Wince McCan't thought to himself - Soon Austin...You Will Never See It Coming...
(Stone Cold + 40 / Lou Thesz -21).
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Fly on The Wall Report:
Afghanistan Bananastan Part IV:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(From The Journal Of Little Beaver):
The scene is the newly purchased top two floors of a three story building. On the ground level is Coven Blacks brand new gothic / fetishy live rock band bar and restaurant that is run by his 27 valets, the establishment is simply called Blacks Coven, and it is a huge hit - always packed and also attracts transients.
The second and third floors are officially the property of a ficticious law firm named Low Devil Beaver - this stands as a front to conceal the headquarters of Afghanistan Bananastan.
The second floor houses a reception area, lounge with a bar and 5 meeting rooms, the 5th being gigantic and has a table that can seat 50 people in a roughly oval shape.
The third floor houses the individual offices of each of the members. Within the center of the floor there is a common area equipped with a bar twice the size of the one on the second floor. In the four corner offices (Sky Low Low, Little Beaver, She Devil & The Wicked Monk) there are also fold out beds.
This meeting takes place in the largest of the meeting rooms - most in attendance are drinking liquor, beer or wine, and picking from italian food, some are having Swami's Stash and Oreos. In the background we hear The Rolling Stones - Get Yer Ya Yas Out Album playing.
This is the largest meeting this group has had so far, more like Afghanistan Bananastan Deluxe, they have a lot to discuss:
Little Beaver - O.K. everybody, please settle down.
(As Beavie patiently waits for the marginally coherent crowd to settle down, he turns to look at Ron Simmons who silences the room):
Ron Simmons - DAMN!!!!! (about a third in attendance are startled, but all settle down).
Phone Ap - ALL RIGHT...WHERE YOU AT...
Little Beaver - Thank you Ronnie...ok the first item for mention is to welcome all of you to our new swanky digs!
(All clap, except Tommy Chong who thinks they are applauding for him because he miraculously just fit 10 Double Stuff Oreos in his mouth at the same time).
Little Beaver - We are all set up officially as Low Devil Beaver - Thank you Loophole.
David Lee Roth - I still love that name, sounds like a demonic man-eating vagina monster movie, no-one will hassle us.
Little Beaver - Also - starting on Monday is our new receptionist Ms. Maggie Hancock. That employment agency set us up with her since we decided to just let Theresa work The LXG Office exclusively...with an upgraded AK47 for pest control.
She Devil - (Smiling) And a sprinkler system override button.
Sky Low Low - Hallelujah!
Little Beaver - Cheech and Chong, we have already spoken with Epoch and he gives us his blessing in what we are about to ask of you.
Cheech - Ok Beavster...Hey Holmes stop eating all those Fn Oreos, thats the second bag man...lets hear what our next job is dude.
Chong - Allceg da min gogo blaf-fla. (As pieces of Oreos fall down the front of his shirt).
Sky Low Low - You guys know all the highways and backroads of this country better than any of us do...
Bill Murray - We need you guys to work with a small but deeply disturbed Bronx Zoo commando task force to hunt down and apprehend the dozen missing aliens.
Sky Low Low - Once you find them, you are going to stun them with these, (holds up what looks like a typical granade), it won't kill them because they are pressure packed full of Swami's Stash in potent gaseous form.
Cheech - Wow man...Blunt Granades!!
Chong (still can't say much because of all of the double stuff Oreos in his mouth...but starts to clap enthusiastically).
Little Beaver - Once the granades make them silly - then you can strap all of them inside the back seats of the big yellow soundproof school bus you guys will hunt them with.
Bill Murray - Above all gentlemen...the key here...is discretion...also please maintain your current look...as if you float through life without any goals...whatsoever.
Chong - (Holds his two thumbs up).
She Devil - Next up there is definitely more going on than meets the eye when it comes to Hoffman and Swinburn Islands off the coast of Staten Island...for this job we would
Wolf - (puts down his meatball parm hero and speaks while chewing) - I'm on it.
She Devil - Thanks Wolf...Wait how did you know that...never mind...I should have figured you would have figured that.
Wolf - (Smiles and chews) - Me and Lope would be even better...there will still be clues there somewhere...I can feel it.
Sky Low Low - Done.
Wolf - You right Sky...Hot when she's confused.
Sky Low Low - She's hot when she's anything.
She Devil - (Smiling) Down boys...down.
The Wicked Monk - The LXG Arena on the Moon is in full swing and on target to host the Only The Strong Survive Tournaments...but we need another presence up there.
Sky Low Low - Not so much on the facilities and the arena...but on everything...including a watchful eye on space.
Endgame - (Puts down his pepperoni and jalapeno pizza slice and talks while he finishes chewing) - For this task - I know who would be perfect.
Little Beaver - That's wonderful...Thank You Endgame.
She Devil - Is it who I think it is?
Endgame - Yes, I have been conversing with him for a while now...he is a being from The Astral Plane...capable of much surveillance, travel and sight...has also figured out a way to assume human form.
The Wicked Monk - Really...
Endgame - And he could probably outwrestle all of us and perhaps the rest of The League.
Sky Low Low - Really...
Endgame - If you catch my meaning...according to him...The Dark Menace has just today signed alot of questionable and dangerous talent.
Sky Low Low - We are going to have to figure out a solution for DM.
She Devil - Maybe we could buy him out?
Playboy Buddy Loophole Rose - (As he eats a big plate of disco fries) - Let me see what I can whip up in writing...something too good not to pass up.
The Wicked Monk - Fantastic...Thank You Loophole.
Robert Redford - (rustling through the numerous bags of food on the table, he then looks up at The Wicked Monk)
(The Wicked Monk, without an ounce of misunderstanding says) - Cannolis are next to Neckless over there.
(Plethador tosses the small bag of cannolis to Redford who catches it and starts picking through it as he sits)
Plethador - I'm going to start working with Father Jonathan in therapy, he seems to have been through a very traumatic experience on or around Hoffman Island...I will keep you all posted.
(Father Johnathan is sitting in a chair looking aimlessly outside the window, basically calm but obviously disturbed, The Wicked Monk's bodyguard Behemoth is sitting with him - who is so concerned that he can't eat - and he loves to eat).
Robert Redford - When does the hotel and casino open up on the moon Sky?
Sky Low Low - Soon we hope.
Robert Redford - A lot of people in Hollywood are very interested in The LXG...I think we could make a serious killing...I will spread the word and talk to the people who think they're the big shots...we'll pack em in.
The Wicked Monk - Thanks a million for being able to come Sundance.
Sky Low Low (To Redford) - Its about time you Slacker...
Robert Redford (To Sky as he finishes his cannoli and licks his fingers) - Sky...Don't make me get up...and steal your girlfriend.
David Lee Roth - I've seen him do it Sky...the man is a wizard...
Sky Low Low - You Bastard!! (And throws a loaf of italian bread at Redford who ducks it).
(As Sky, Redford and all in the room laugh, She Devil looks at Robert Redford and thinks where have I seen him before? Oh yeah - that movie The Hot Rock - where the phrase Afghanistan Bananastan comes from)
(Wolf is watching her think and slightly shakes his head smiling).
She Devil - (Without realizing it she says out loud but low about Redford) - Damn...he still looks good.
Sky Low Low - (To She Devil) - Did you say something babe?
She Devil - What?...No Sky...(she starts eating a sausage calzone as Ron Simmons smiles at overhearing and witnessing all of this).
Little Beaver - Regarding Vipers Pit, our fill in camera man will be Ron Simmons (several in attendance give a simultaneous DAMN!! - in tribute...Ron puts his hand to his chest to show he's touched but never stops eating his Chicken parm hero), and Miss April Hunter will be stage direction, (an even louder ensemble DAMN!! is uttered by the same people - including Simmons - The Phone Ap said - THE ONLY DIRECTION MY CAMERA WILL POINT IS AT HER. a few seconds later).
Little Beaver - Pit Viper wanted to be here but he accidentally locked himself inside the orgasmatron so he's now in a fetal position and taking a verg long nap...but he did said WHOA! in agreeance...Also Witness and a couple of the other limo drivers have volunteered to help Epoch's smuggling needs.
Sky Low Low - And I am going to be refereeing the Eight Men Out commissioners tournament
Massif - And Im going to be his timekeeper.
Sky Low Low - This way Massif and I can keep our eyes on all of these freaks - especially McCant.
David Lee Roth - Nothing to report yet from Kevin Sullivans mansion yet, other than he and Godsend actually searched the room for a planted bug. He didn't find mine...but Satan's a little slicker than I thought he was.
She Devil - Aethran of The New Empire Thrash is officially pregnant and Disaster has kicked her out - at least temporarily - another Aethran who is sympathetic to Disasters and the groups ideals named Calm has joined up with them.
Endgame - I have a question...who exactly is this Ski Mask?
Sky Low Low - Good question...
She Devil - my Devil's Advocates tell me that he actually is...Santon The Loner.
Wolf - Ahhh...now this is starting to make sense...Santon was the first Aethran Minister of War...who now has suddenly resurfaced for the purpose of this war...and obviously reclaiming his title.
Endgame - Disaster has already proclaimed himself the leader though...
She Devil - Santon will probably let him think that as long as it serves him...
Endgame - who is arranging this upcoming Aethran War of Independence Match?
She Devil - I am...but I could use a second set of eyes on it.
Endgame - How about some Silver One's?
She Devil - Done.
Little Beaver - Only two more items and then I say we all get really drunk (everyone in the room - DAMN!!! The Phone Ap says - HELL YEAH, Chong and his Oreos says - Aga-oogie!
Little Beaver - The Bulk now has his 10,000 man strong Midget Militia by the arena on The Moon for security and his Ship The Led Zeppelin is in orbit around the moon...for those of you that may not know...The Led Zeppelin is an old starship that is grey and roughly shapped like a 1,000 foot long zeppelin that was built on our home planet Tegdim...This is The Bulks warship.
Sky Low Low - Loophole could you check up on all legalities of the moon? Maybe we can stake a claim, or prevent someone else from?
Loophole Rose - All its going to cost you is a six pack of Sam Adams and a sleeve of Oreos.
Sky Low Low - Done and Done.
Loophole Rose - Oh also, I may bring in some additional legal counsel, she's a friend of mine who works for Long, Slow & Screw L.L.C.
Sky Low Low - Also Done.
Robert Redford (while chewing on a Garlic Knot) - Does anybody have a picture of April Hunter?
Bill Murray (while raising his hand) We're gonna need two pictures.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Month 4 - Card 12 - Match Announcements:
1. Justin Credible vs Greg The Hammer Valentine.
2. Red Bastien vs Strangler Lewis.
3. The Unpredictables - Jay Lethal & Johnny Gargano with The Unpredictable Johnny Rodz vs The Master Race - Zygon & Thraxx with The Dark Menace.
4. Buzzsaw vs. Lope.
5. Slashmaster & Pierre The Enormous with Sly Drury vs Brute & Massacre with The Leveler.
********* Vipers Pit- Episode 6 **********
6. The Lords of Flatbush Semi Final Match - Death & Distruction - (Kevin Steen, Michael Elgin, The Road Warriors) vs. Damage Incorporated - (The Sheik, Bruiser Brody, Sabu & LXG World Champion - Rob Van Dam.
7. Endgame vs. Sammael The Morningstar (he has told his official manager Thantos that his presence at ringside isnt necessary).
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A League of Extraordinary Gentlemen...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
|
|
|
Post by TTX on Oct 14, 2017 11:55:44 GMT -5
Some really great matches with wrestlers from all over the galaxy and card sets.
|
|
