Dynamo Powerhouse Wrestling

[db1091]

Ricky Starks is playing with fire getting into it with Haku! Come on, Danhausen, prove you are better than Egon.

[Joel Pole]

#82 - Power Hour on MTV
(Year 2 - Month 5 - Week 3)

Welcome to Dynamo Powerhouse Wrestling! This is Power Hour on MTV coming to you live, as always, from the DPW FlexZone! We are one week away from SLAMLAMADINGDONG III and all the pieces are falling into place! We expect big confrontations between DPW Tag Team Champions The Road Warriors and #1 contenders The Sheepherders and DPW Champion Kenny 3.0mega and former champ AJ Styles! MTV Champion Count Brockula defends and we see the Power Hour debut of SeFa & Jacob Fatu of The Family as The Young Blood in our main event! All this and more! Let’s get down to the ring for our opening contest.

MATCH ONE:

Galloway’s Muscle

WALTER

w/ Galloway

vs.

Cactus Matt Sydal

#1 Contender to the DPW Title Galloway and his Muscle WALTER have been butting heads lately and it seems that WALTER intends to prove to his boss that he’s not just another flunky and tonight Galloway’s Muscle is pitted against Cactus Matt Sydal, former MTV Champion. It’s a rather one-sided squash as WALTER manhandles the agile Sydal by plucking him out of the air and planting him straight down onto his pencil neck. WALTER shouts, “Do you see this?” as he hooks in the GOJIRA CLUTCH causing Cactus Matt to tap wildly. After the match Galloway instructs WALTER to go down to one knee. “Excuse me, my English is not the greatest, you want WALTER to what?” And Galloway repeats, “On. Your. Knees.” WALTER stares daggers at his boss before turning his gaze to the crowd. “No! No! No!” The crowd is chanting; they’re on WALTER’s side. “I don’t think so–” WALTER says into the mic. Galloway is beside himself. WALTER continues, “I think I’ll see you next week at SLAMALAMADINGDONG 3, and whichever one of us walks out of this ring next week under his own power will be #1 contender to the DPW Title!” Mic drop. The crowd is going wild for WALTER, maybe someone will finally shut that blow-hard up once and for all and send him packing back to Scotland.

RESULT: WALTER d. Sydal by submission with the GOJIRA CLUTCH

BACKSTAGE PROMO:
Former Boys Champion Absolute Ricky Starks has seen better days. After being wronged by The Family and Playboy Val Venis Starks has lost both his Boys Title to Uncle Jimmy but also has lost his girlfriend, The Playboy Bunny, to her captors and tormentors, Playboy Venis and Dr. Ass William Gunn. Starks stares deep into the camera, “I have a choice to make. Do I seek to avenge my Boys Championship, the title I fought so hard to attain, from the men who cheated and stole that belt from around my waist? Or do I try to save an innocent young woman who is being forced to do incredibly demeaning things (like answering fan mail) and acquiesce to the whims of the men who have wrongfully enslaved her? The answer is Absolutely simple. Venis, Gunn… you two sickos are going to answer for your sins next week. I don’t care which one of you I have to take out first, but she’s coming home with me. I guarantee it.”


MATCH TWO:

All Ego

Ethan Page

vs.

Space Monkey

w/ Danhausen

Chaos envelopes the Toy Hunt Vlog Crew! All Ego Ethan Page has turned on his long-time friends and challenged Danhausen to a match at next week's supercard and tonight is taking on the group’s own Space Monkey. Danhausen is here to give Space Monkey moral support and to possibly talk some sense back into his wayward friend. Ethan Page uses Danhausen himself as a distraction to poke Space Monkey in the eyes and deliver a low blow behind the ref’s back. Uncalled for! Ethan Page hits his EGO’S EDGE and despite Danhausen trying to REVERSE CURSE some comeback into his buddy Space Monkey is down for the 1-2-3. Danhausen scoops his fallen comrade from the canvas while All Ego gloats and parades in the ring, telling Danhausen that the MTV Title shot is practically his, he already has a bottle of the finest champagne ordered for his celebration next week after SLAMALAMADINGDONG 3. With Big Bad Brody King missing since his cage match loss to Jacob Fatu, is there anyone at all that can mend this rift between such good allies?

RESULT: Ethan Page d. Space Monkey by pinfall following EGO’S EDGE

BACKSTAGE PROMO:
Jim Cornette is at the Interview set with Acting DPW Commissioner Teddy Long and standing behind Corny is Nugenix Express, Sheiky & Big Vein Vader, sans the DPW Tag Team Title belts. “It was a disaster! It was a calamity! A catastrophe! It was a cataclysm! A devastation! A tragedy and a travesty, even! There’s no way in Hell those Road Warriors could have walked away with the Tag Team Titles if it wasn’t for one man! He’s not a man! He’s less than a man–he’s a worm! That worm, Boner Bob! Bob, you got a lot of nerve showing back up after we all made peace with your untimely passing. Did you ever stop and think how that made US feel? Sure, we were happy you were alive, but c’mon, brother, we moved on. We all moved on and then you showed back up and drudged up all these old emotions and you MADE us turn on you–” Teddy Long finally gets a chance to interrupt while Corny had to actually take a breath–”Corny, you–” and he’s cut off again: “And you got the nerve, Boner Bob, to show up and interrupt our Tag Team Title match and cost us the belts?! Well, I hope you got some dick pills left cuz you’re gonna need them next week. Show up to SLAMALAMADINGDONG 3 and suffer the consequences of screwing over your brother, The Meat That Can’t Be Beat, The Ten Inch Terror himself, “Cocky” Khosrow The Iron Sheik and feel for yourself, right in the middle of your spine, what Nugenix can do for you! Let’s go boys, I’m tired of getting harassed by Teddy Long here, let’s get out of here!”


LOCKER ROOM SEGMENT:
The new DPW Tag Team Champions The Road Warriors come out of the shower with towels around their waist returning to their lockers. “Hey, Hawk, did you leave your locker open?” The men realize their locker doors are ajar, “No, Animal, I didn’t.” They pull their Tag Team Title belts out of their respective lockers and the belts are dripping with something, something slimy. “What in the fu–” there are weird streaks smearing the face of the belts, “has somebody been…. Licking our belts?” Hawk & Animal stare at each other as they begin to hear a faint chuckle coming from around the corner and Luke & Butch of The Sheepherders respond in unison, “Noooooooooo–” and they run away as fast as possible as Hawk & Animal go into a roid-rage and begin smashing up the locker room, “We’re gonna send you idiots back Down Under. Six feet under!” while they resume destroying the locker room bench.


MATCH THREE:

MTV TITLE

8th MTV Champion [6th Defense]

The Non-Vampiric Beast

Count Brockula

w/ Paul Heyman & Jon Moxley

vs.

The Living Legend

Larry Zbyszko

The mysterious friendship between Possible Vampire Jon Moxley and his new protege Brock Lesn–Count Brockula, has intrigued audiences for weeks. Brockula’s manservent Paul Heyman had issued an open challenge to become the new face of MTV and this week the challenge was answered by The Living Legend himself, Larry Zbyszko who entered to a big pop. Brockula hits the challenger with a barrage of German suplexes but The Living Legend refuses to give up. Eventually a stream of blood begins to trickle from the nose of Zbyszko which excites Brockula when he gets a whiff. Brockula seems to grow twice his size as he hoists Larry up into the air with seemingly superhuman strength and drops him in the F-5. 1-2-3. Heyman is beginning to look quite weathered, shuffling excitedly to grab Brock’s MTV Title belt and trailing behind Brock & Mox as they head back to their dirt pile in the corner of the locker room to brood or do whatever they do back there. Heyman groans into the camera, “Who’s next for the Count? He’s up to 6 victims now!”

RESULT: Brockula d. Larry Zbyszko by pinfall following F-5 to retain the MTV Championship

PROMO VIDEO:
Bryan Danielson is slowly walking through the dark catacombs beneath the FlexZone, his path illuminated by small emergency lights that intermittently cut out. “Are you out there, Max? Can you hear me?” No answer, Danielson continues walking. “You think you’re scary, Max? You think you’re intimidating me?” No answer, Danielson continues walking, “You think that you’re some sort of Gatekeeper? You think that you have any right to keep me from the DPW Championship? You think that you can get in my way?” No answer, Danielson continues walking, “I don’t have any beef with you, Max. You clearly have something to prove to yourself, you want to justify your recent actions? Is that what it is, Max? You want to convince yourself that the disgusting state you’re in isn’t a reflection of who you really are, deep down inside, Max? You think that the monster you see in the mirror isn’t the monster we’ve always seen, Max? You think that will make what you’ve done okay? You think that will justify the things you’ve done, Max? The things you did, Max. The things you did to Effy, Max?” The emergency lights all go black. Danielson smirks, “Did I strike a nerve?” In a whirlwind of flame The Phantom MJF appears before The American Dragon, “YOU SHUT YOUR DAMN MOUTH! You’ve bitten off more than you can chew this time Danielson. You’ve awakened a flame eternal. Do you understand what it means, Danielson? This flame will engulf you and in the end there will be no relief, not even for a dragon. Your blood will boil, Danielson, and your bones will become ash and in the end there will be but one man left, one man holding the DPW Championship, and I can tell you this, Bryan. It won’t be you.” And in a flash the Phantom has again seemingly disappeared leaving Danielson standing alone in a dimly lit concrete passageway, the sound of a dripping pipe echoing through the corridors of darkness in both directions.


BACKSTAGE PROMO:
The Family is backstage: Boys Champion Uncle Jimmy Snuka, Papa Haku, and Sefa Fatu & Jacob Fatu. “It appears that young Ricky Starks has tucked his tail between his legs and run back home to his mommy after being humiliated by The Family. The Family will soon hold all of the gold in DPW and nobody will be able to stop us. I am Boys Champion and next week at SLAMALAMADINGDONG 3, my brother Papa Haku is going to take the MTV Title away from that freak, Lesnar, and soon these two boys will hold the DPW Tag Team Titles, isn’t that right?” Snuka looks down upon his younger family members, “What did we decide you were going to be called?” Papa Haku jokingly suggests, “The Young Pups?” They laugh hardily while imitating a young wolf pup attempting to howl when they’re cut off–”We are The Young Blood. And it’s our blood that will be continuing our bloodline into the future,” he adds, “not some dried-up old–” Papa Haku steps up, “Respect your Elders, boy.” And Sefa bites his tongue. With a glance Sefa conveys to his brother that it’s time to go before he does something regrettable and The Young Blood make their way to the ring.


MATCH FOUR (MAIN EVENT):

The Young Blood

[Sefa Fatu & Jacob Fatu]

vs.

The Kinkdom

[Mike Bennett & Matt Taven]

w/ Kevin Sullivan

There is a fire lit beneath SeFa & JaFa and The Young Blood intend to wreak havoc on the tag team division on behalf of The Family. Tonight The Kinkdom are accompanied by Kevin Sullivan by his lonesome, his wife Maria Kanellis-Sullivan hasn’t been seen since she caught “her Kevvy” in the broom closet with a woman he referred to as his Fallen Angel. Matt Taven & Mike Bennett are on top of their game this evening putting on a fantastic tag team display against their savage opponents. SeFa, possibly because of the intense pressure he’s been put under, can’t seem to focus on the match; he can feel the peering, leering eyes of The Elders judging his every move. Matt Taven is able to tangle The Samoan Werewolf up on the far side of the ring as Mike Bennett is able to hook in his CUCK-HOLD on SeFa and SeFa has no way out. Ding ding ding. It’s a brief celebration before The Kinkdom make their expedited exit due to Jacob Fatu throwing a tantrum–as well as the announce table–due to this turn of events. Not a great first showing for The Young Blood, SeFa will certainly be eating crow this evening. This can only inspire The Samoan Serial Killer to prove his worth and nobody is going to stop him.

RESULT: The Kinkdom d. The Young Blood when Sefa submits to Bennett’s CUCK-HOLD

BACKSTAGE SEGMENT:
Playboy Val Venis and Dr. William Gunn are backstage in the locker room standing in front of an open briefcase and a blindfolded Playboy Bunny. Venis says, “Sticky Ricky, you’ll never learn. You’ve been bested. What’s yours is mine. Soon I will be a champion, but for now, I have something more precious than gold, I have–” “Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hang on there, Playboy, it may be yours, but I believe tonight it’s my turn.” Dr. Ass is putting gloves, lubricants, silicone toys, a ham sandwich, and some anal beads into the briefcase and closes the lid. CLICK. “Of course, Dr. Gunn. And you have a new appointment, Doctor. Next week, Saturday at 9pm, you have an exam scheduled with Sticky Ricky Starks.” Dr. Gunn says, “Great. Ricky, please arrive half an hour beforehand to fill out any necessary paperwork, thank you.” He then grabs his briefcase in one hand and tosses The Playboy Bunny over his shoulder as she screams, “Ricky! Ricky! Save me!”


IN-RING SEGMENT:
Bobby “The Brain” Heenan is standing in the middle of the ring alongside the DPW Champion Kenny 3.0mega. “Look at this man! This man is a champion. He has been programm–I mean, trained to be a ruthless, mechanical, killing machine. So to speak. He is a champion of the past, he’s the champion of the present, and he is champion looooong into the future. Do you know how we know this?” Heenan taps his temple, “He’s been there, ladies and gentlemen. He’s been to the future, he told me what I have for breakfast a week next Tuesday and it’s delicious, and he told me I didn’t even like the new Beetlejuice movie so I don’t even have to see it! This man is a champion, but most of all he is a Terminator, and he is going to exterminate all of the vermin standing in his way–” AJ Styles saunters out through the curtain causing the crowd to pop! “What the hell do you want?” Heenan barks. “I’ve come to issue a challenge. I had no problem defeating your Muppet Riddle last week and I deserve a rematch for MY BELT! ME! MOI!” Heenan thinks it over, “I’ve fed all the variables into my computer and now Kenny 3.0mega is calculating his odds of winning and checking the results from the future before he responds, what do you say, Champ?” Heenan holds the microphone up to Omega and The Terminator peers over his black shades, “2 out of 3 Falls.” Wow! It seems a challenge has been issued, what is the word? “You’re on!” The crowd goes wild as the match is set for next week here on MTV. Omega-Styles II. Two out of Three Falls!

Join us on MTV next week for our 3rd bi-monthly supercard:

MTV presents DPW:

SLAMALAMADINGDONG III

DPW TITLE

2 OUT OF 3 FALLS

Kenny 3.0mega(c) vs. AJ Styles

DPW TAG TEAM TITLES

Road Warriors(c) vs. The Sheepherders

MTV TITLE

Count Brockula(c) vs. Papa Haku

#1 CONTENDER MATCH - DPW TITLE

WALTER vs. Galloway

#1 CONTENDER MATCH - MTV TITLE

Ethan Page vs. Danhausen

CUSTODY OF THE PLAYBOY BUNNY

Ricky Starks vs. Dr. William Gunn

Bryan Danielson vs. The Phantom MJF

Cocky Khosrow The Iron Sheik vs. Boner Bob Backlund

And MORE!!!

DPW #81 - Power Hour on MTV
DPW # 82 - Power Hour on MTV
DPW #83 - SLAMALAMADINGDONG 3 on MTV
DPW #84 - Power Hour on MTV
DPW #87 - BEEF HOUSE BRAWL on PPV

[db1091]

Woo, go Taven and Bennett. Great write up

[Joel Pole]

#83 - SLAMALAMADINGDONG III on MTV
(Year 2 - Month 5 - Week 4)

Welcome to Dynamo Powerhouse Wrestling! This is SLAMALAMADINGDONG 3 on MTV coming to you live, as always, from the DPW FlexZone! What a night of action: The Road Warriors defend the DPW Tag Team Titles against The Sheepherders, Brockula defends the MTV Title against Papa Haku, Nugenix Express Explodes as Cocky Khosrow The Iron Sheik takes on his former partner Boner Bob Backlund! All this and more! And in our main event: 2 out of 3 Falls for the DPW World Heavyweight Championship as DPW Champion Kenny 3.0mega defends against the former champ The Phenomenal AJ Styles! Let’s get down to the ring!

MATCH ONE:

#1 CONTENDER MATCH - MTV TITLE

All Ego

Ethan Page

vs.

Danhausen

“All Ego” Ethan Page disappointed fans everywhere when he turned on his “Goro Bro” and attacked Danhausen several weeks ago but Danhausen will not just sit and take it; he has been a former champion in DPW and knows he’s capable of doing it again. One on one, no friends, no allies, these two former besties collide! Danhausen tries to have a fair, honest wrestling match but his opponent has lust for gold in his eyes and pulls no punches, at one point blasting Danhausen with his own GROIN PUNCH while the ref was distracted. Ouch-hausen. Ethan Page catches Danhausen with a series of RKEgo’s–and one more funsies–and hooks the leg for the 1-2-3 as Danhausen fruitlessly tries to raise a shoulder. Ethan Page is screaming, “You see?! I’m the better wrestler and I will be the next face of MTV!” while he continues kicking his prone foe while shoving the referees away. Ethan Page hoists Danhausen up to deliver an EGO’S EDGE but suddenly Big Bad Brody King comes flying in from out of nowhere and pulls Danhausen from Page’s clutches. Ethan Page realizes he’s outnumbered and scrambles through the ropes while King checks on Danhausen in the ring. Ethan Page, once making it a safe distance from Big Bad Brody King, resumes his crowing about his MTV Title shot next week on Power Hour. What is left of the Toy Hunt Vlog Crew?!

RESULT: Ethan Page d. Danhausen by pinfall following EKEgo to become #1 contender for the MTV Championship

VIDEO PROMO:
Bryan Danielson is standing outside Effy’s hospital room, “MJF, you think this is a game? You think that the world will accept you–as you are–if you become the DPW Champion? You’re a monster now without reason, but I want you to know: this is no game, okay? This is real life. This is people’s lives. This is Effy’s life now. He’s been recovering from the burns you inflicted on him for weeks and weeks and they don’t know how long it’s going to take until he’s able to go home–” At this moment the door opens and Allie Katch exits the room, looks at Danielson with tears in her eyes, and goes running down the hospital hallway bursting out crying, “You’ve gone too far, Max. I won’t let you go any further. For Effy’s sake, and, God, for your sake too, Max.” Tears welling up in the eyes of The American Dragon as his voice begins to crack, he opts not to continue speaking and turns to enter Effy’s hospital room.


MATCH TWO:

TAG TEAM TITLES

4th DPW Tag Team Champions [1st Defense]

The Road Warriors

[Hawk & Animal]

vs.

The Sheepherders

[Luke & Butch]

The Road Warriors, fresh off being crowned the new DPW Tag Team Champions, were harassed–for lack of a better term–in their locker room by those “Salacious Sellers of Saliva,” the men who seem to be obsessed with licking anything and everything, Luke & Butch, The Sheepherders who earned their title shot last month at THE SECOND BEEFENING. The Road Warriors are much more intimidating than their challengers, but The Sheepherders’ gig marks and body scarring hints that there may be something hiding beneath the facade of innocent naivete of this goofy, bumbling duo with tongues lolling out every which way. Hawk & Animal have no problem keeping on top of this team, at one point Animal would power slam Luke who would tag out to Butch, take a power slam, and tag out to Luke until both New Zealanders were ostensibly performing a square dance in their corner, eventually hooking Animal and then Hawk into a do-si-do which enrages the champs! Hawk is holding Luke down in the corner screaming, “LICK THIS!” while Animal covers Butch following a humongous POWER SLAM and the ref counts a mercifully fair 3-count before awarding The Road Warriors back their DPW Tag Team Championship title belts! WHAT A RUSH!

RESULT: The Road Warriors d. The Sheepherders when Animal pins Butch following POWER SLAM to retain the DPW Tag Team Championships

MATCH THREE:

The Iron Sheik

Cocky Khosrow Vaziri

w/ Jim Cornette

vs.

Boner Bob Backlund

Nugenix Express Explodes! The match we thought we’d never see–primarily because we thought Bob Backlund was dead at sea! But Boner Bob came back only to be kicked to the curb by his former manager, James E. Cornette, whose supply of Nugenix Total-T dick pills is the not-so-secret source of his team’s power. Corny blames Boner Bob for costing Nugenix Express the Tag Team Titles two weeks ago and is siccing The Iron Sheik on his former partner. Both Cocky Khosrow and Boner Bob are excellent singles wrestlers and have no problem keeping up athletically, but that’s when Corny’s secret weapon comes into play. Corny has a mountain of different pill bottles stacked up on the apron of the ring and dispensing different colored pills to Sheiky and Sheiky takes control. The threat of the bulge in Sheik’s jocks grows as the aforementioned bulge itself grows; monstrous, but Boner Bob is able to escape Sheik’s deadly finisher. Corny becomes agitated and hops up on the apron and swings his tennis racket at Backlund who side-steps it and the racket slams right into Sheik’s crotch! WHAM! Sheiky’s eyes go crossed as a brick falls out of Corny’s tennis racket cover! That’s when Corny realizes that Backlund has gotten into his stash! Dick pills spill out of Boner Bob’s mouth as he chews and swallows, his own member becoming engorged to Championship-level sizes! Backlund gets a leg and drops his concrete-like erection straight down into the spine of Cocky Khosrow! CRUNCH! Vaziri is tapping to the Boston Crab! It’s over! Corny pulls Sheiky out of the ring as the referee raises Boner Bob’s arm in victory! He’s done it! Bob Backlund has–hold on, wait a moment, what’s this? Bob Backlund is grabbing at his crotch as it continues to grow; it keeps growing, and growing, and growing! Medical staff rushes in to attend to Backlund as we see Jim Cornette laughing from the stage, “You fell for it, you idiot! You grabbed the bottle of my special concoction: Nugenix Giganto! You may have won this battle, Boner Bob, but the war is far from over! And I don’t know when we’ll see you again because you may not even fit inside the FlexZone by next week! Good luck!” Poisoned dick pills?! Is this what we’ve come to? Poisoned dick pills?!

RESULT: Bob Backlund d. The Iron Sheik by submission following an Enhanced Boston Crab

MATCH FOUR:

CUSTODY OF THE PLAYBOY BUNNY

Dr. Ass

Dr. William Gunn, Proctologist

w/ Playboy Val Venis & The Playboy Bunny

vs.

Absolute

Ricky Starks

Poor Ricky! Playboy Val Venis has done nothing but torment his former partner, “Sticky Ricky,” since his surprise return to DPW. Ricky “stole” Val Venis’ Playboy Bunny, so Venis “stole” her back and then cost Ricky the prestigious DPW Boys Championship on top of it all. Ricky has vowed to rescue his girlfriend The Playboy Bunny from the evil clutches of her boss Playboy Val, but now also must contend with Venis’ personal proctologist Dr. Ass William Gunn. Sitting at ringside next to Playboy Val Venis is a handcuffed and blindfolded Bunny, “Ricky! Save me!” she cries. Absolute Ricky Starks has one goal in mind, but seeing and hearing her cries for help while being fondled and groped by Val Venis mere feet away lets Dr. Ass easily overpower the young superstar. Dr. Gunn drapes Starks over the second rope right in front of the damsel in distress just to rub it in his face before dropping his STANDING LEG DROP on the neck of poor Ricky and he’s out like a light. 1-2-3. Playboy Val drags The Playboy Bunny into the ring as he raises Dr. Gunn’s arm. Playboy Val Venis takes the blindfold off of The Playboy Bunny, “Helllloooo, Bunnnnyyyy. I wanted you to get a good look at this…” Dr. Gunn has already applied his rubber glove sans lubricant and yanks down Ricky’s trunks before ramming a finger where the sun don’t shine, “THE DOCTOR IS IN!” Gunn smirks as he shouts and Ricky suddenly regains consciousness and scrambles under the bottom rope with his gear around his ankles. Poor Ricky!

RESULT: Dr. Ass d. Ricky Starks by pinfall following STANDING LEG DROP

MATCH FIVE:

The American Dragon

Bryan Danielson

vs.

The Phantom

M.J.F.

The Phantom MJF is sick, twisted, and demented with hate and revenge ruling every waking thought. A perverted version of what once was fair, a young and promising superstar in the world of professional wrestling has been transformed by his hate and quest for vengeance into a monster; first it was the scars left over from MJF’s bloody deathmatch brawl with his former championship partner Effy at BEEFAMANIA last year that scratched the psyche of MJF, and those scratches began to rust as MJF brooded in the bowels of the FlexZone, plotting his revenge on Effy, wearing a cape and mask to cover the scars that wrap around his body, neck, and face. But it was the INFERNO MATCH that really pushed MJF over the line. The raging fires around the ring burned and damaged MJF’s skin and face, removing his hair and leaving him looking somewhat like a Jewish Freddy Krueger, and the white Phantom half-mask that he donned has been melted and fused with the skin of his face and in the dim light of the corridors beneath the FlexZone he remains. Until tonight. The Phantom MJF is on a mission to keep all threats away from ‘his’ DPW Championship and right now the biggest threat is definitely The American Dragon Bryan Danielson who courageously accepted Phantom MJF’s challenge. As the match begins Danielson seems to be wrestling circles around MJF. The Phantom can’t keep control and eventually Danielson hooks in his CROSSFACE CHICKEN WING but that’s when someone showed up at ringside: NIGEL MCGUINNESS! Where did he come from?! Is this the BLAST FROM THE PAST that Phantom MJF had warned Danielson about? Danielson can’t believe what he’s seeing and suddenly Phantom MJF has the upper hand. MJF gets Danielson in a neverending SALT OF THE EARTH ARMBAR unfortunately for MJF he gives up out of frustration mere moments before Danielson’s arm would have snapped. Danielson makes a rousing comeback and despite attempted interference by Nigel Phantom MJF goes limp to the CATTLE MUTILATION and the referee signals for the bell. What a contest, but what end does MJF have in mind by bringing Nigel McGuinness to DPW? Obviously this will be one large hurdle for The American Dragon to overcome on his quest for the DPW Championship.

RESULT: Danielson d. Phantom MJF by submission with CATTLE MUTILATION

MATCH SIX:

MTV TITLE

8th MTV Champion [7th Defense]

The Non Vampiric Beast

Count Brockla

w/ Jon Moxley & Paul Heyman

vs.

Papa Haku

w/ The Young Blood

We’re not really sure what’s going on with Brock Lesnar. He’s been hanging out in Jon Moxley’s corner of the locker room where they do whatever it is that they do, purely non-vampiric, they say, but their skin keeps getting paler and their bloodlust in the ring and outside the ring is getting insatiable. Count Brockula once again comes armed with his “good friend and nothing more” Jon Moxley as well as his advocate Paul Heyman who is looking more and more like the hunchback of Notre Dame by the week. Bockula defends his MTV title tonight against one of his biggest threats yet Papa Haku of The Family. Boys Champion Uncle Jimmy Snuka has assumed leadership of The Family and has made their mission to take all the gold in DPW. SeFa & JaFa have their work cut out for them this evening as Count Brockula has been on a warpath, undefeated since regaining the MTV belt. Haku is quite the savage but there’s something otherworldly about the power and aura that Brockula brings to the table. Brockula hits a series of German suplexes and SeFa hops up on the apron to draw the referee who promptly ejects The Young Blood from ringside! Oh no! They protest but Brockula lifts Haku up in the air–almost with no effort at all–and drops him in an F-5 before hooking in a Kimura Armlock to get the submission victory. Wow! Uncle Jimmy surely won’t be happy, but something tells me he’ll blame SeFa before he blames his fellow Elder. Heyman comes running after Brockula and Mox, “Brock! Brock! Wait for me!” Moxley takes the MTV Title Belt from the hands of Heyman and stops him as Brock continues through the curtain, “Brock!” Moxley whispers, “Paul, I don’t think Brock wants to be friends with you anymore.” Heyman looks puzzled and hurt, “He what?” “Yeah, I think it would be best if you didn’t come around our Crypt anymore.” Heyman grumbles, “You mean your dirt pile” Moxley shrugs it off, “Whatever, I don’t–I mean, Brock doesn’t want you around any more. So beat it.” Moxley turns and leaves a pouting Paul Heyman frozen in the aisleway unsure of what to do. “Is this true? Does Brock really feel this way?” Heyman wonders as the world moves on around him.

RESULT: Brockula d. Papa Haku by submission with Kimura Armlock to retain the MTV Championship

MATCH SEVEN:

#1 CONTENDER MATCH - DPW TITLE

Galloway

vs.

WALTER

Galloway really knows how to pick ‘em. The two men whom he entrusted to be his Mouth & his Muscle have both turned on him. First it was Roddy Piper who felt he deserved a shot at the DPW Title and Galloway put him down last month and we haven’t heard a peep from Piper since. After a streak of impressive wins WALTER then dared to question the authority of Galloway and here we are: Galloway’s title shot at BEEF HOUSE BRAWL next month on Pay-Per-View is on the line tonight. Galloway and WALTER are both two phenomenal athletes and this truly is a match of hosses. Galloway misses a CLAYMORE KICK allowing WALTER to catch him in a brutal POWER BOMB but before he can make the cover he spots someone strolling around the ring swinging a chain, a bloody chain, it’s Roddy Piper! Last we saw Piper he was beefing with Galloway so nobody is really sure what his intentions are. Galloway recovers and hits a CLAYMORE KICK which sends WALTER careening through the ropes to the outside right in front of Piper. Piper begins helping WALTER up to his feet but as Galloway draws the ref’s attention Piper hauls back and wallops WALTER across the back of the head with his chain but WALTER doesn’t go down. He yanks the chain from the hand of Piper, this wasn’t supposed to happen! Galloway slips through the ropes and comes up from behind while WALTER is swinging the chain around which Piper ducks but it whacks Galloway across the jaw! Ding ding ding! Clearly Piper is not on the side of WALTER, but is he altogether on Galloway’s side after all of this? Galloway has secured his title shot next month despite the hinky circumstances and hopefully next week on Power Hour we’ll hear from Roddy Piper on why he did what he did!

RESULT: Galloway d. WALTER by disqualification due to a brawl outside the ring involving Roddy Piper

MATCH EIGHT (MAIN EVENT):

2 OUT OF 3 FALLS MATCH

DPW TITLE

7th DPW World Heavyweight Champion [1st Defense]

Kenny 3.0mega

w/ Bobby Heenan

vs.

The Phenomenal

A.J. Styles

AJ Styles was wronged 4 weeks ago when Bobby Heenan sprayed WD-40 on the ropes to cause him to slip which cost AJ the DPW World Heavyweight Championship. AJ demanded a rematch but Heenan made Styles face his newest protege Matt “The Grouch” Riddle on Power Hour before AJ would challenge again, this time the champion agreed, but stipulated 2 OUT OF 3 FALLS. This becomes a wrestling masterclass by these two superstars before too long. Both men prove why they deserve to be called DPW Champion, and when Kenny 3.0mega hits his HADOUKEN fireball punch it sends Styles flying backwards into the turnbuckle, the whiplash snapping his neck backwards before crumpling forward into a cover by the champ. 1-2-3. 3.0mega takes the first fall. It’s an uphill battle now as the Phenomenal One tries to regain control. Heenan shouts advice as well as ridicule from ringside which lights a fire underneath Styles. Styles gets into a jaw-jacking session with “The Brain” which allows 3.0mega to criss-cross and build up speed, the sound of tiny motors working in overdrive inside his legs, smoke begins to seep from his joints, BAM! 3.0mega hits a V-TRIGGER which again whiplashes the head and neck of the challenger. Styles is seeing stars and doesn’t even realize the ref has begun his count until it’s already over as he still tries to kick his legs. It’s over. The Prophecy, so far, has come true, and Kenny 3.0mega appears to be leading Dynamo Powerhouse Wrestling into the future as World Heavyweight Champion. What’s next for The Phenomenal AJ Styles? Is 3.0mega ready to take on the challenge of former 2-time DPW Champion Galloway at BEEF HOUSE BRAWL?

RESULT: Omega p. Styles following Hadouken to take the first fall.

Omega d. Styles by pinfall following V-TRIGGER to retain the DPW World Heavyweight Title

Join us in 4 weeks on pay-per-view for:

DPW presents:

BEEF HOUSE BRAWL

DPW TITLE

Kenny 3.0mega vs. Galloway

DPW # 82 - Power Hour on MTV
DPW #83 - SLAMALAMADINGDONG 3 on MTV
DPW #84 - Power Hour on MTV
DPW #87 - BEEF HOUSE BRAWL on PPV
DPW #91 - SLAMALAMADINGDONG IV

[db1091]

At least Brody still respects the deep Goro Bros bond

[Joel Pole]

#84 - Power Hour on MTV
(Year 2 - Month 6 - Week 1)

Welcome to Dynamo Powerhouse Wrestling! This is Power Hour on MTV coming to you live, as always, from the DPW FlexZone! We are still reeling from SLAMALAMADINGDONG III as we barrel toward BEEF HOUSE BRAWL on Pay-Per-View in just 3 short weeks! Tonight we’ll see #1 Contender Qualifying Matches for the DPW Boys Title & Tag Team Titles! We’ll hear from reigning DPW Champion Kenny 3.0mega and in our main event Count Brockula will defend the MTV Title against “All Ego” Ethan Page, and much, much more!

IN-RING SEGMENT:
Heenan steps through the ropes alongside Matt Riddle. Bobby “The Brain” Heenan introduces DPW Champion Kenny 3.0mega who successfully defended the title last week against former champ AJ Styles in a 2 out of 3 Falls Match; Heenan is bragging about Omega’s win, how his Prophecy is coming true, and that’s when he’s interrupted by #1 Contender Galloway. Galloway tells Heenan & Omega that “playtime is over” and he will be reclaiming his DPW Title in 3 weeks at BEEF HOUSE BRAWL on pay-per-view. Heenan invites Galloway to find a friend (wryly as Galloway has pushed away his actual team mates) and meet 3.0mega & Riddle in a no-holds-barred tornado tag team match versus Galloway and a partner of his choosing in 2 weeks on an MTV special presentation one week before BEEF HOUSE BRAWL: it’s the BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE on MTV! WALTER enters behind Galloway but doesn’t attack him, he instead takes the microphone from him and says that he still intends to prove that he’s worthy of competing for the DPW Title and challenges Matt “The Grouch” Riddle to a match right here, right now!

Match One:

WALTER

vs.

Matt “The Grouch” Riddle

w/ Bobby Heenan & Kenny 3.0mega

It doesn’t take a detective to see that WALTER feels screwed by Galloway and Roddy Piper following his match last week leaving WALTER disqualified and no longer on course to face the DPW Champion and he wanted to get his hands on the next best thing: the champion’s stablemate. WALTER’s pure power is oft countered by Matt Riddle and on occasion Heenan reaches down into a large silver garbage can he’s dragged to ringside and provides Riddle with a treat or a snack; it seems that maybe the trash can is Riddle’s home. WALTER is uneasy with the likes of Heenan, 3.0mega, and even Galloway lurking around ringside. The action spills outside and Heenan draws the ref’s attention while Omega and Riddle team up on WALTER! How unfair! Riddle assists Omega in delivering a double powerbomb on WALTER right thru the announce table! The ref immediately turns around upon hearing the thunderous crash of bodies through wood onto concrete and immediately calls for the bell. Galloway watched all this go down and didn’t raise a finger to help WALTER, clearly his former Muscle isn’t at the top of the list of potential tag team partners for the BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE MATCH. Heenan, Riddle, and DPW Champion Kenny 3.0mega crow about their victory and taunt Galloway on their way back up the aisle. Who will Galloway find to be his partner?

RESULT: WALTER d. Riddle by DQ when Omega & Riddle powerbomb WALTER through the announce table

LOCKER ROOM PROMO:
The Family is meeting in their locker room, “Disappointed,” Boys Champion Uncle Jimmy shoots a glance to his fellow Elder, Papa Haku, “SeFa, JaFa, you have let The Family down.” SeFa knows that Snuka is just saying that to get his ire, “First you lost your tag team match against the Perverts and then you failed to make sure your Elder brought home the MTV Title.” SeFa starts to interject but Snuka cuts him off, “--And don’t give me that BS about Lesnar being some sort of vampire. He said he isn’t one,” SeFa and Jacob Fatu roll their eyes at the gullibility of their Family-member. “There’s a little tournament going on and the winner will be challenging me for the Boys Title in 3 weeks at BEEF HOUSE BRAWL. SeFa, JaFa, you will ensure that this title stays in The Family, is that clear?” SeFa and JaFa bite their tongue, “Yes, sir.” Snuka smirks smugly, “And next week you two get a chance to qualify for a Tag Team Title Match. The Young Blood will be delivering the Tag Team belts to The Family, is that clear?” SeFa and JaFa are both furious that Snuka has decided to show up and start bossing them around, but for now it benefits The Young Blood to have their Family on their side, “Yes, sir.” Papa Haku grabs the cameraman, shouts something in a foreign language and hoists him out of their locker room and slams the door.


BACKSTAGE INTERVIEW:
Jim Cornette is backstage with one half of Nugenix Express, Big Vein Vader. “Boner Bob, you silly idiot. I fully expected you to pilfer my pills at ringside, to ransack my rations, to stick your grubby little paws where they don’t belong. Well F-around and find out, as the kids say. How did you like that sample of Nugenix Giganto, Bob? Did they get the antidote to you in time or did your gargantuan member even fit in the ambulance? You may have won that match at SLAMALAMADINGDONG III, Bob, and in the process you put poor Sheiky’s back out of whack! His spine is misaligned! And it’s your fault! Cocky Khosrow isn’t finished with you yet, but next week, if you’ve still got any manhood left down there, you oughta show up to Power Hour and go face-to-face with the man that squeezed you out of Nugenix Express, The Mastodong himself, Big Vein Vader!” Vader pounds his crotch and growls. “If you still got the balls, Bob, they’re in your court!”

VIDEO PACKAGE:
A video package shows Bryan Danielson, The American Dragon, training, talking about his goal of becoming DPW World Heavyweight Champion. He talks about looking towards the future, but having to reconcile with his past, both his shady doings with D-Meditation-X, but also his past before Dynamo Powerhouse Wrestling. He says that the last person he expected to see was Nigel McGuinness, a figure from Danielson’s past, that The Phantom MJF clearly brought to here to keep Danielson away from the DPW Title, but Danielson says that he will not be distracted, he’s going to confront Nigel and show The Phantom MJF that people grow, people change, and it doesn’t have to go down the way that The Phantom hopes it will.

BACKSTAGE INTERVIEW:
Galloway enters the interview set and is questioned by Acting DPW Commissioner Teddy Long, “Galloway, do you accept Heenan’s challenge for the BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE MATCH? And if so, who will your partner be? WALTER? Roddy Piper?” Galloway whines that it’s an unfair proposal, he shouldn’t have to deal with this before his big title match at BEEF HOUSE BRAWL. He says he accepts the challenge but he hasn’t decided on a partner yet. Teddy Long begins to ask a follow-up question but in a burst of frustration Galloway knocks the microphone out of Long’s hands and storms off to his locker room.


Match Two:

#1 CONTENDER QUALIFYING MATCH - TAG TEAM TITLES

The British Bulldogs

[Davey Boy Smith & Dynamite Kid]

vs.

The Kinkdom

[Mike Bennett & Matt Taven]

The Kinkdom celebrated a stunning win against The Young Blood two weeks ago and they are raring to go in this qualifying match but we haven’t seen nor heard from The Bulldogs since their loss to The Sheepherders over a month ago, rumor has it they returned to Merry Old England to learn a new hold or two, we’ll see how they fare this evening. Taven, Bennett, & Maria were startled to discover Kevin Sullivan making out in a mop closet with some woman named “Nancy” and there was a big blow-up, and now neither Kevin NOR Maria are joining The Kinkdom at ringside! Where could they be?! Davey Boy Smith & Dynamite Kid take turns on offense, keeping Taven from making the hot tag but then he does and Mike Bennett goes wild on the Bulldogs. Davey Boy Smith finally cuts off his comeback and takes him down with a devastating RUNNING POWERSLAM, their bodies bouncing feet off the mat. Smith grabs Bennett in an impressive fisherman’s suplex and arches his back. Davey gets the pin. The Bulldogs are yet again one step closer to the DPW Tag Team Titles and The Kinkdom needs to get together and figure out what the heck is going on, Taven & Bennett struggled without their extra help at ringside they have become accustomed to.

RESULT: The British Bulldogs d. The Kinkdom when Davey Boy Smith pins Mike Bennett with a fisherman’s suplex

BACKSTAGE SEGMENT:
Galloway bursts into his locker room, the door almost flying off its hinges. He’s pissed at the situation he’s gotten himself into: forced to show up for a tag team match one week before his big title match after he’s ostracized himself from his former stablemates Piper & WALTER. From the shadows in the corner of the locker room Roddy Piper makes his presence known, idly swinging his steel chain still speckled with the dried blood of DPW Commissioner Gorilla Monsoon, “I’m ready to help, Galloway. Just say the word.” Galloway thinks over his limited options for tag partner, “No, thanks, Roddy. I know who to ask…” and Galloway stands up, swallows his pride, and leaves Roddy alone with his bloody chain and exits the locker room. Where is Galloway headed?


PROMO VIDEO:
Absolute Ricky Starks is addressing Playboy Val Venis and Dr. William Gunn. Starks was within arm’s reach of his kidnapped girlfriend before being knocked out and medically assaulted in the middle of the ring last week and Starks says he is finally able to walk normally again. Starks says that he has spent every waking moment planning The Playboy Bunny’s rescue, stopping Venis & Gunn, and then finally taking back the Boys Title. And it all starts with one step. “Venis, I’m ready to end this once and for all. Me and you, BEEF HOUSE BRAWL, I challenge you to a LADDER MATCH, and hanging above the ring will be The Playboy Bunny. The first person to climb the ladder and retrieve her will get to keep her! What do you say, Playboy?” Rather unconventional, but this must somehow be part of Ricky’s master plan, how will Venis respond?

Match Three:

#1 CONTENDER QUALIFYING MATCH - BOYS TITLE

The Ideal Specimen

Lanny Poffo

vs.

The Aerial Assassin

Will Ospreay

With Ricky Starks aiming to take down Playboy Val Venis the field is wide open for challengers to vie for the Boys Title, currently around the waist of The Family’s Uncle Jimmy Snuka. The Ideal Specimen Lanny Poffo makes his way to the ring, prancing and dancing down the aisle and then we’re introduced to his opponent: The Aerial Assassin Will Ospreay who suffered two brutal losses to MTV Champion Count Brockula over 4 weeks ago and is making his triumphant return this evening. These two battled on Power Hour 5 months ago and Ospreay stood victorious; will history repeat itself tonight? The bell rings and the two men square off. Poffo sends Ospreay off the ropes, he ducks down, Ospreay comes back and attempts a quick sunset flip on Poffo but Poffo has it scouted. Poffo holds onto the leg, shoulders are down, 1-2-3! What an upset! Lanny leaps to his feet in astonishment! What a win for The Ideal Specimen! Poffo now goes on to BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE in 2 weeks to determine who will challenge for the Boys Title at BEEF HOUSE BRAWL on PPV! Ospreay is dejected but determined to turn his fortunes around very soon.

RESULT: Lanny Poffo d. Will Ospreay by pinfall following reversed sunset flip to earn match for #1 contender for the DPW Boys Championship

LOCKER ROOM SEGMENT:
Mike Bennett & Matt Taven are back in the locker room. They haven’t seen Kevin or Maria all day or night, where could they be? They were even able to best The Young Blood two weeks ago but without any other members of their orgy to help they’re swimming upstream! Taven and Bennett are stripping their ring gear and getting ready to wash off as they discuss their plans to become DPW Tag Team Titles to prove to Maria that she should stay with The Kinkdom. The nude duo grab their towels and go to enter the shower; as they pull back the curtain they are met with a surprise! Kevin Sullivan, Maria Kanellis-Sullivan, and the mysterious Fallen Angel “Nancy” are sudding each other’s bums whilst making out in the shower. “Excuse us!” Kevin Sullivan exclaims as he pulls the shower curtain closed again. Taven & Bennett slowly turn to each other, “What the hell is going on?!”


BACKSTAGE SEGMENT:
Galloway is walking past the private locker rooms of several of the top stars in DPW and he stops at the one everyone least expected. Knock knock. Galloway enters the locker room and closes the door before we see the nameplate: AJ STYLES.


Match Four (Main Event):

MTV TITLE

8th MTV Champion [8th Defense]

The Non-Vampiric Beast

Count Brockula

w/ Jon Moxley

vs.

All Ego

Ethan Page

Heyman is out! After the MTV Title defense last week Moxley told Heyman that Brock didn’t want him around anymore and told Heyman to kick rocks! The MTV Champion Brock Lesnar, now fully under the influence of his new “best friend” has almost completely transformed his look and demeanor showing a more beastly, animalistic side to the champ… and you’d swear he was growing fangs. Their thirst for blood cannot easily be quenched it seems. All Ego Ethan Page got “too big for his britches” and challenged his partner Danhausen to a match in order to earn his spot tonight, and earn it he did, demolishing his former partner at SLAMALAMADINGDONG III but now Page faces an otherworldly foe in the Count. Ding ding ding. Ethan Page does his best but he cannot keep up with the strength and supernatural abilities of the champ. Lesnar hits a series of brutal German suplexes, an F-5 and then delivers the punctuation with a hefty spinebuster and remains in the pinning position. It’s all over. All Ego Ethan Page certainly owes some answers to the Toy Hunt Vlog Crew! And who will be next to step up and challenge Count Brockula for the prestigious MTV Championship?

RESULT: Count Brockula d. Ethan Page by pinfall following German suplex, F-5, & spinebuster to retain the MTV Championship

Join us next week on Power Hour on MTV!

Big Vein Vader vs. Boner Bob Backlund

#1 CONTENDER QUALIFYING MATCH - TAG TEAM TITLES

The Sheepherders vs. The Young Blood

#1 CONTENDER QUALIFYING MATCH - BOYS TITLE

Cactus Matt Sydal vs. Larry Zbyszko

Defending MTV Champion Count Brockula!

And MORE!!!

DPW #83 - SLAMALAMADINGDONG 3 on MTV
DPW #84 - Power Hour on MTV
DPW #85 - Power Hour on MTV
DPW #86 - THE BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE on MTV
DPW #87 - BEEF HOUSE BRAWL on PPV
DPW #91 - SLAMALAMADINGDONG IV on MTV

[Joel Pole]

#85 - Power Hour on MTV

(Year 2 - Month 6 - Week 2)

Welcome to Dynamo Powerhouse Wrestling! This is Power Hour on MTV coming to you live, as always, from the DPW FlexZone! BEEF HOUSE BRAWL on Pay-Per-View is in just 2 short weeks but next week on MTV is THE BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE and the cards for both shows are filling up fast! We have two more #1 Contender Qualifying Matches here tonight for the DPW Boys & Tag Team Titles and in our Main Event Boner Bob Backlund will come face-to-face with his former partner Big Vein Vader! And much, much more!

Match One:

MTV TITLE

8th MTV Champion [9th Defense]

The Non-Vampiric Beast

Count Brockula

w/ Jon Moxley

vs.

Rohit Raju

Count Brockula has dominated since recapturing the MTV Title and has defended the title a record-setting 8 times already. Tonight he is challenged by Rohit Raju hoping to climb out of the shadows of the former United Empire and make a name for himself in DPW. Rohit tries to stay in the game but one too many German suplexes from The Non-Vampiric Beast leaves Rohit’s bell rung and he crumbles to the outside. The sharks smell blood. Literally. Brockula and Moxley alternate beating Raju in the head with a steel chair and then take turns licking the chair like it’s a mixer covered in cake batter. The referee calls off this bloody affair and Rohit Raju is announced as the winner by disqualification. Brockula retains his MTV Title and he got a snack out of it, that’s efficiency. Who can come along and dethrone the king of MTV Count Brockula?!

RESULT: Rohit Raju d. Brockula by DQ when Brock & Moxley beat him bloody at ringside. Lesnar retains the MTV Championship.

BACKSTAGE INTERVIEW:

Big Bad Brody King is at the interview set; he admonishes Ethan Page for ruining the friendships, for ruining the camaraderie… for ruining The Toy Hunt Vlog Crew. He says that he won’t forget what Page did to Danhausen, “And for what? To lose to Lesnar like a little b!%@#?” Brody King challenges “All Ego” Ethan Page to a match next week at THE BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE.





LOCKER ROOM SEGMENT:

Swerve Strickland & Jay Lethal are in the locker room, “The Black Lads are sick of being overlooked here in DPW,” Lethal opens. He says that he and Swerve are still one of the only teams to have defeated The Road Warriors and so THEY should be DPW Tag Team Champions. Swerve interjects, “Listen, Hawk & Animal, if you’re as tough as you say you are, come face us next week at THE BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE and let us give you a little warm-up match before your title defense in two weeks,” Jay Lethal continues, “If we beat you next week, we get a Tag Team Title shot next, instant #1 contenders, what do you say?” Lethal concludes, “Show up next week, champs. And we’ll show you why BLACK LADS MATTER!” It may not be wise to poke the bear; do these two know what they’re getting themselves into?





LOCKER ROOM SEGMENT:

#1 Contender for the DPW Title Galloway is in his locker room when there is a knock on the door and it slowly creaks open. It’s WALTER. “What the hell are you doing here?” Galloway inquires, wondering what his now-former stablemate wants from the former 2-time champ. WALTER says, “You know I want nothing to do with you; you’re ruthless, you’re conniving, you’re untrustworthy, but more than I hate you I want revenge against Heenan & Omega & Riddle. They put me through a table last week and I’d love nothing more than to get my hands around their necks, NO HOLDS BARRED.” Galloway actually considers the offer but declines, “No. I have other plans,” and Galloway pushes past WALTER to head down the hallway backstage.





Match Two:

#1 CONTENDER QUALIFYING MATCH - BOYS TITLE

The Living Legend

Larry Zbyszko

vs.

Cactus

Matt Sydal

The Living Legend had a brief stint managing inaugural Boys Champion Danhausen in WPW before that job got out of hand and Zbyszko wants to forge a new chapter in his career and prove that he’s still got something left in the tank and has been awarded this opportunity. Cactus Matt Sydal broke free from D-Meditation-Y and even captured the MTV Title, albeit briefly, and Sydal believes it is his time to shine. Both athletes put forth a solid effort this evening but Zbyszko seems to resort to some of his old heel tactics and removes the padded cover from the turnbuckle! Sydal sidesteps a charge and Zbyszko goes flying head first into the steel buckle! Sydal jumps on the opportunity, scales the corner and comes crashing down with a SHOOTING STAR PRESS and hooks the leg, 1-2-3. Cactus Matt Sydal will be heading into THE BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE to battle Lanny Poffo to see who will wrestle Snuka in two weeks for the DPW Boys Championship!

RESULT: Matt Sydal d. Larry Zbyszko by pinfall following SHOOTING STAR PRESS to earn a Boys Title #1 Contender Match at THE BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE

PROMO VIDEO:

A promo video, narrated by Bobby Heenan, showcases the accolades and accomplishments of reigning DPW World Heavyweight Champion The Terminator Kenny 3.0mega from him winning the WPW World Title, his alleged trip far into the distant future, and then his triumphant return to DPW and his capturing the DPW Title from AJ Styles just over a month ago. Kenny 3.0mega says that he’s been tuned up, he got an oil change, got his testicles rotated, and he’s primed and ready for action. “Galloway, I have you in my sights, and you will be Terminated.”





IN-RING SEGMENT:

The American Dragon Bryan Danielson invites Nigel McGuinness to join him in the ring. Nigel enters to a chorus of boos which causes a smirk to creep across Nigel’s lips and he enters the ring and stands face-to-face with his old foe, “It’s been a long time, Dragon,” McGuinness greets Danielson but does not reciprocate a handshake. Danielson opens up to McGuinness, telling him that he wouldn’t be the superstar he is today without going through the trials and tribulations of his career across from Nigel. Danielson says that he forgives McGuinness for siding with Phantom MJF and for listening to Phantom MJF’s twisted lies and offers an olive branch. Bryan Danielson once again extends his hand to Nigel and Nigel looks to the crowd, “YES! YES! YES!” The crowd is screaming in unison. Nigel reaches out his hand and the two shake. What a pop! The hatchet has been buried and— NO! Nigel pulls Danielson towards him suddenly and BAM! The Dragon gets a knee right in the yambag! “I’ll see you at BEEF HOUSE BRAWL, Dragon!” As Nigel steps back through the curtain we see the melted silhouette of Phantom MJF congratulating his new minion for successfully completing the task he was charged with.





Match Three:

#1 CONTENDER QUALIFYING MATCH - TAG TEAM TITLES

The Sheepherders

[Luke & Butch]

vs.

The Young Blood

[Sefa Fatu & Jacob Fatu]

The Sheepherders couldn’t capture tag team gold at SLAMALAMADINGDONG 3, can they earn another chance this go ‘round? Luke & Butch are not well prepared enough to face these two Samoan savages, SeFa & JaFa, who dominate the duo from down under. SeFa tags out strategically and when it’s most effective SeFa sends The Samoan Werewolf in to finish the job. BAM! JaFa crashes down on top of Luke with a MIGHTY MOONSAULT and continues to snarl and growl as the referee hesitantly gets close enough to count the pin. The Young Blood are going to BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE to battle The Bulldogs and if Boys Champion Snuka gets his way the DPW Tag Team Titles are going home to The Family very soon.

RESULT: The Young Blood d. The Sheepherders when Jacob Fatu pins Luke after a MIGHTY MOONSAULT to earn a #1 Contender Match at THE BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE

PROMO VIDEO:

Playboy Val Venis & Dr. William Gunn, Proctologist have been causing much undue pain and suffering to both Absolute Ricky Starks as well as his girlfriend, The Playboy Bunny, whom the duo have kidnapped and done God-knows-what to in the meantime. “Sticky Ricky, when you get knocked down, stay down,” Playboy Val Venis tells Starks that he accepts his challenge to a PLAYBOY LADDER MATCH at BEEF HOUSE BRAWL and tells Starks that he’s scheduled his follow-up appointment with Dr. Ass immediately following the match. Dr. William Gunn asks The Playboy Bunny, “You aren’t afraid of heights, are you, babe?” She screams for help as Venis & Gunn cackle maniacally.





BACKSTAGE PROMO:

The Family is backstage at the interview set. Boys Champion Uncle Jimmy Snuka praises The Young Blood, “Congratulations, boys. You are one step closer to making your Elders proud and capturing the Tag Team Titles, and there’s one man I want to thank above all others…” SeFa’s strategies spelled victory for The Family in that match, but he suspects– “Jacob, my boy. You were amazing tonight. Keep up the good work,” and Snuka shoots a sideways glance at SeFa expecting outrage but SeFa doesn’t take the bait. “Soon all of the gold in DPW will reside with The Family!” Despite trying to cause a rift between the two, Snuka has only solidified their resolve: The Young Blood will become DPW Tag Team Champions.





LOCKER ROOM SEGMENT:

Knock knock knock. Galloway enters the locker room of The Phenomenal AJ Styles once again. Galloway asks Styles if he has considered the proposal he made to him last week. Styles replies, “I never thought that you would ask me to team up with you… and I never thought that I would say yes.” Styles says he’s not happy with Galloway, but he’s even more upset with Heenan’s group for stealing “his” DPW TITLE (“Me! Moi!”) Styles wants his hands on The Terminator, he wants his hands on the DPW Champion, however he can. They shake hands. It’s official, next week in THE BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE MATCH: DPW Champion Kenny 3.0mega & Matt “The Grouch” Riddle versus Galloway & The Phenomenal AJ Styles! It’s gonna be wild!





Match Four (Main Event):

The Mastodong

Big Vein Vader

w/ Jim Cornette

vs.

Boner Bob Backlund

Boner Bob has been up and he’s been down, he’s been alive and he’s been dead, he’s been average-sized and he’s been Giganto… 2 weeks ago at SLAMALAMADINGDONG 3 Backlund forced Sheiky to submit to the Enhanced Boston Crab but the enhancement never stopped: Backlund had stolen a bottle of experimental Nugenix Giganto and he suffered several sleepless nights since before last week Jim Cornette & Big Vein Vader challenged Boner Bob to a match. Vader’s raw strength proves a challenging obstacle but Backlund’s pro-wrestling prowess is inimitable. Backlund pulls a bottle of dick pills out of his trunks and Vader snatches them from his hand and guzzles the entire bottle down in one gulp! Corny swings his tennis racket at Boner Bob and misses but as Bob turns around he’s met with a big falling face slam from The Mastodong! Vader climbs to the top and avalanches down onto his opponent with an Earth-shaking VADERSAULT and Vader gets the pinfall victory. Big Vein Vader and Jim Cornette are celebrating in the ring when suddenly Vader gets a concerned look on his face. He looks down into his tights and squeals! “CORNY! CORNY! IT’S GONE!” Corny takes a peek and yes, indeed, Vader’s manhood has virtually disappeared! “Are you sure it’s not just buried under all this fat?” Corny worriedly suggests, but no, Big Vein Vader ain’t so “big” anymore. “What did you do?!” Backlund is shaking his head laughing as he holds up a bottle of “NO-GENIX,” it’s an ANTI-DICK PILL! Corny is furious, Vader is panicking, and The Iron Sheik will certainly be seeking revenge on behalf of Nugenix Express!

RESULT: Big Vein Vader d. Boner Bob by pinfall following a VADERSAULT

Join us next week on MTV for THE BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE:

DPW presents:

THE BEEF HOUSE

STAMPEDE

BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE MATCH

DPW Champion Kenny 3.0mega & Matt Riddle

vs.

Galloway & AJ Styles

#1 CONTENDER - BOYS TITLE

Lanny Poffo vs. Cactus Matt Sydal

#1 CONTENDER - TAG TEAM TITLE

The British Bulldogs vs. The Young Blood

DPW Tag Team Champions The Road Warriors vs. The Black Lads

Big Bad Brody King vs. All Ego Ethan Page

Defending MTV Champion Count Brockula!

And MORE!!!

DPW #84 - Power Hour on MTV
DPW #85 - Power Hour on MTV
DPW #86 - THE BEEF HOUSE STAMPEDE on MTV
DPW #87 - BEEF HOUSE BRAWL on PPV
DPW #88 - Power House on MTV
DPW #91 - SLAMALAMADINGDONG IV on MTV

[db1091]

Good win for the Fatus, looking forward to Brody getting his hands on Ethan